I've always wanted to go to one of those places where they let you destroy junk with a baseball bat. Basically, you pay to rage for like 15 minutes. My dream is to rage against all the printers they've got.
2. Hell yeah. And I think the key here would be having the discipline to keep it turned off for more than like five seconds. I'd turn the internet off for at least six months -- just to give our brains some time to heal. Of course, once I turned it back on it'd only take a few weeks to get back to where we were. See: SARS-CoV-2 pandemic.
3. Human vs. printer epitomizes the travails of the technological revolution. I think the engineers do it on purpose, to test our resolve.
4. I miss iPods as standalone music players. The OG iPod was pretty dang cool, and I'm hoping Apple cynically makes a new one to capture the "retro market" in a few years.
You just got yourself a job at Apple with this comment. You're now in charge of retro tech. I know you had other plans, but it's not like all the productivity gained through technological innovation actually led to more leisure time anyway.
I would turn off the internet in a heartbeat - so long, not nice to know you - if the cost is nobody ever reads another word of mine unless it’s handwritten in a letter, so be it. This opinion comes from someone who is not a tech-phobe, has run a digital magazine, and knows enough to know how much I hate all the stuff like social media and AI that will soon make everyone tethered to a screen rather than the actual blooming, glorious, falling-to-pieces world around them.
End of rant. By the way, eons ago, before the web, I had a job that would have been perfect for you, Michael: I was a software developer for an educational publisher, and my job was to break programs to uncover all the bugs - basically to do what little kids do, punching random keys or options - I could usually break raw programs in seconds. Programmers don’t think like children or bona fide human beings.
And I definitely prefer CDs - you know, *albums* - to any streaming music system. Have a nice day, says ChatGPT with real authority 😉
You are not the only one who misses CDs and I'm not giving mine up.
I came to the whole tech thing late, and as I like to say, my knowledge is shallow yet narrow, but it's deeper than my partner's, who only joined the 20th century a few years ago. That was not a typo. I still own a dial phone connected to a land line.
Hang onto your land line. the quality can't be beat, the sanity of a leaving your phone behind is nice too. plus, i hear the kids are into retro stuff.
It's almost a necessity here, as we have so many power outages, and have bad cell service when that happens. We also have a locally owned phone company, one of the last independent phone/internet companies in the country, and our lines are buried underground.
Of course I have a cell phone, so I can no longer leave the phone behind, but it's nice to think I can.
Ugh. You sound like my husband. And I am Christina at our house! But I’m more like you trying to help Jane when I’m trying to help him. You can see the problem in our house. We need a Christina. And so does Jane! All hail the tech people. They are the ones with the real power. 💪
The easy button was a lie both on the computer and my pants!
I'd think about turning off the internet, but then I'd have to wait days for you to mail Situation Normal assuming you could get the computer and printer to work.
Printers suck because that way they can keep selling you more of them.
CD's aren't gone. I just bought some a week ago. Rip the CD to the computer, load it on the phone and listen to what you really want in the car.
The people available to do more tech support are trying to build the machine to do it at least as badly as the people who do tech support now.
This right here really nailed it: "The people available to do more tech support are trying to build the machine to do it at least as badly as the people who do tech support now."
Oh my gosh, I'm crying with laughter!! You ARE brilliant!! I don't believe the backstory...you're just being modest. 😸 This is like learning Santa Claus or the Tooth Fairy aren't real. I will need some time....
Meanwhile: Thank you for your super kind words about my writing and Beyond. They touched my heart! ❤️❤️❤️ And thank you for sharing my essay. I'm all aglow after being featured in Situation Normal! Thank you, brilliant friend!
1. Excellent pic of Mortimer! That's the main thing. Go share it on Notes, Michael!
2. No fn way I want to go back to 1998. Sorry, nope. No way. CDs and DVDs and other media I have to keep? No thanks. I like keeping files stored in the cloud, I like that computers are 100 times faster now and more powerful, and I especially like that pushing buttons gets things delivered to my home reliably. Politically, though? That's a very different situation.
If I can have my cake and eat it, I'd take an awful lot from the past. It's probably 60/40, or maybe even 55/45 present/past as to which is clearly better, so if I have to take it, all or nothing, the present is gonna win every time.
However, if I can line-item veto things from the past (EG, sexist/racist/homophobic attitudes that were basically mainstream), while keeping the good things like not being afraid of stochastic terrorism, having 2 parties that respect the rule of law, etc, then as long as I get to keep high speed internet, we can really create something great.
Now all we have to do is master time and space. Incidentally, I've already seen "Everything Everywhere All at Once", so I'm probably halfway there.
Pity the fool who has to write that app or design that "easy" button! His/her audience didn't actively choose the author, unlike Substack, and can't just pick up another if they don't like the lede. Not the most recpive frame of mind for an audience, amirite?
1. My biggest beef with technology is that it's supposed to be less work/brainload than analog solutions and for me IT NEVER IS!!!
2. I would 100% push that button (after I memorized all my closest friend's phone numbers like I used to in middle/high school. I would move to a quiet place with ample hammock hanging locations and spend my days writing and talking to my closest friends on the phone. There would be dogs and ponies, too. And a rainbow a day, at least.
3. Printers are co-artists designed to bleed you dry paying for ink cartridges. I print about 10 sheets of paper a year and I've spend like $250 on ink. It's possible I'm exaggerating a bit in both directions. But only a BIT.
4. I still play CDs in my car. I miss mix tapes.
5. The machines are smarter than the people who built them is my guess. Or douchier. Either way, machines 1: humanity: 0.
I'm so glad you shared Jane's essay. When I read it earlier this week,I loved it.
I am the tech support in our household which isn't saying much. The big difference between my partner and me is that I read the instructions, even if I have to search them out each time the wifi goes down or the phones need a kick in the pants. Printers, however, defeat me. I actually broke mine when I was trying to change the ink. Tore the tip right off. Anger may have been involved.
One of my favorite movies scenes is from Office Space when they destroy the printer. There’s a lot of wish fulfillment there. Also, Christina doesn’t read the instructions. She just gets it, somehow. I read them, but I often get hung up when I find typos or poorly worded sentences, which seems to happen more and more these days.
“Move!” (apologies to SNL’s “Computer Guy”).
Printers! It is so crazy!! Why can’t I buy a printer that prints things!?!?
I've always wanted to go to one of those places where they let you destroy junk with a baseball bat. Basically, you pay to rage for like 15 minutes. My dream is to rage against all the printers they've got.
A rage room just for printers would do very well!!!
1. Yep.
2. Hell yeah. And I think the key here would be having the discipline to keep it turned off for more than like five seconds. I'd turn the internet off for at least six months -- just to give our brains some time to heal. Of course, once I turned it back on it'd only take a few weeks to get back to where we were. See: SARS-CoV-2 pandemic.
3. Human vs. printer epitomizes the travails of the technological revolution. I think the engineers do it on purpose, to test our resolve.
4. I miss iPods as standalone music players. The OG iPod was pretty dang cool, and I'm hoping Apple cynically makes a new one to capture the "retro market" in a few years.
5. Keynesian leisure -- allegedly.
You just got yourself a job at Apple with this comment. You're now in charge of retro tech. I know you had other plans, but it's not like all the productivity gained through technological innovation actually led to more leisure time anyway.
That actually sounds like a cool job. Better than corrupt Wall Street analyst, at least.
I would turn off the internet in a heartbeat - so long, not nice to know you - if the cost is nobody ever reads another word of mine unless it’s handwritten in a letter, so be it. This opinion comes from someone who is not a tech-phobe, has run a digital magazine, and knows enough to know how much I hate all the stuff like social media and AI that will soon make everyone tethered to a screen rather than the actual blooming, glorious, falling-to-pieces world around them.
End of rant. By the way, eons ago, before the web, I had a job that would have been perfect for you, Michael: I was a software developer for an educational publisher, and my job was to break programs to uncover all the bugs - basically to do what little kids do, punching random keys or options - I could usually break raw programs in seconds. Programmers don’t think like children or bona fide human beings.
And I definitely prefer CDs - you know, *albums* - to any streaming music system. Have a nice day, says ChatGPT with real authority 😉
I'm guessing that job no longer exists, but man I would've crushed that gig.
Long live 1998 <3<3
It was a good year, right? I mean, we probably thought it was terrible and couldn't wait for the 21st century, but we were fools.
Wait…what? CDs are not a thing anymore?
That's the rumor. But don't buy the hype. Keep spinning your CDs!
You are not the only one who misses CDs and I'm not giving mine up.
I came to the whole tech thing late, and as I like to say, my knowledge is shallow yet narrow, but it's deeper than my partner's, who only joined the 20th century a few years ago. That was not a typo. I still own a dial phone connected to a land line.
Hang onto your land line. the quality can't be beat, the sanity of a leaving your phone behind is nice too. plus, i hear the kids are into retro stuff.
It's almost a necessity here, as we have so many power outages, and have bad cell service when that happens. We also have a locally owned phone company, one of the last independent phone/internet companies in the country, and our lines are buried underground.
Of course I have a cell phone, so I can no longer leave the phone behind, but it's nice to think I can.
Ugh. You sound like my husband. And I am Christina at our house! But I’m more like you trying to help Jane when I’m trying to help him. You can see the problem in our house. We need a Christina. And so does Jane! All hail the tech people. They are the ones with the real power. 💪
If you can't beat 'em, marry 'em.
The easy button was a lie both on the computer and my pants!
I'd think about turning off the internet, but then I'd have to wait days for you to mail Situation Normal assuming you could get the computer and printer to work.
Printers suck because that way they can keep selling you more of them.
CD's aren't gone. I just bought some a week ago. Rip the CD to the computer, load it on the phone and listen to what you really want in the car.
The people available to do more tech support are trying to build the machine to do it at least as badly as the people who do tech support now.
This right here really nailed it: "The people available to do more tech support are trying to build the machine to do it at least as badly as the people who do tech support now."
As someone currently waiting to reinstall Windows on my crashed laptop, I heart this very hard.
Sending thoughts and prayers, Michael.
😂😂😂😂😂
Oh my gosh, I'm crying with laughter!! You ARE brilliant!! I don't believe the backstory...you're just being modest. 😸 This is like learning Santa Claus or the Tooth Fairy aren't real. I will need some time....
Meanwhile: Thank you for your super kind words about my writing and Beyond. They touched my heart! ❤️❤️❤️ And thank you for sharing my essay. I'm all aglow after being featured in Situation Normal! Thank you, brilliant friend!
Also: Mortimer is ridiculously cute!! ❤️
I can assure you the backstory is true and I am by no means being modest.
1. Excellent pic of Mortimer! That's the main thing. Go share it on Notes, Michael!
2. No fn way I want to go back to 1998. Sorry, nope. No way. CDs and DVDs and other media I have to keep? No thanks. I like keeping files stored in the cloud, I like that computers are 100 times faster now and more powerful, and I especially like that pushing buttons gets things delivered to my home reliably. Politically, though? That's a very different situation.
I appreciate your take on the past and present. Let's keep the streaming and the downloads and the delivery, but add in some sanity, please.
If I can have my cake and eat it, I'd take an awful lot from the past. It's probably 60/40, or maybe even 55/45 present/past as to which is clearly better, so if I have to take it, all or nothing, the present is gonna win every time.
However, if I can line-item veto things from the past (EG, sexist/racist/homophobic attitudes that were basically mainstream), while keeping the good things like not being afraid of stochastic terrorism, having 2 parties that respect the rule of law, etc, then as long as I get to keep high speed internet, we can really create something great.
Now all we have to do is master time and space. Incidentally, I've already seen "Everything Everywhere All at Once", so I'm probably halfway there.
Pity the fool who has to write that app or design that "easy" button! His/her audience didn't actively choose the author, unlike Substack, and can't just pick up another if they don't like the lede. Not the most recpive frame of mind for an audience, amirite?
1. My biggest beef with technology is that it's supposed to be less work/brainload than analog solutions and for me IT NEVER IS!!!
2. I would 100% push that button (after I memorized all my closest friend's phone numbers like I used to in middle/high school. I would move to a quiet place with ample hammock hanging locations and spend my days writing and talking to my closest friends on the phone. There would be dogs and ponies, too. And a rainbow a day, at least.
3. Printers are co-artists designed to bleed you dry paying for ink cartridges. I print about 10 sheets of paper a year and I've spend like $250 on ink. It's possible I'm exaggerating a bit in both directions. But only a BIT.
4. I still play CDs in my car. I miss mix tapes.
5. The machines are smarter than the people who built them is my guess. Or douchier. Either way, machines 1: humanity: 0.
I think your beef is right on the money! As tech removed one task, it opened up a new universe of shit to worry about.
I’ve found that most towns with libraries will let you print a page for less than 25 cents.
I still try to live as much of an analog life as possible! Tech makes my life so complicated!
How do you listen to music? Teach us your ways!
We have a record player - which really is the best sound ! And I listen to old school radio 📻 when I drive :)
I listen to the radio too. And I love our record player, but our collection is small
I bet very few people had more than 30 LPs back in the day. That’s why it was always a big status symbol in the movies to have 100s of records.
good point! we've got about 15, or so, but we always grab more when we hit a used record store downtown that has a bargain bin for $1 a record.
I'm so glad you shared Jane's essay. When I read it earlier this week,I loved it.
I am the tech support in our household which isn't saying much. The big difference between my partner and me is that I read the instructions, even if I have to search them out each time the wifi goes down or the phones need a kick in the pants. Printers, however, defeat me. I actually broke mine when I was trying to change the ink. Tore the tip right off. Anger may have been involved.
One of my favorite movies scenes is from Office Space when they destroy the printer. There’s a lot of wish fulfillment there. Also, Christina doesn’t read the instructions. She just gets it, somehow. I read them, but I often get hung up when I find typos or poorly worded sentences, which seems to happen more and more these days.