This is good advice, David. Sometimes I see a knee-jerk reaction comments like this one, as if you need to be doing something *more* to make the world a better place. While there's always more that can be done (and the more is really important), how we live and treat each other matters a lot.
My first labor and delivery was like something out of a horror movie. And I went the natural route. Because I'm Superwoman (or an idiot). I think about that whole experience (because you don't have the luxury of forgetting what happened when you don't use the drugs) when I'm faced with something scary or "impossible" and worry (foolishly) that I won't survive it.
I appreciate you, Michael. Please hug Christina (who I've never met, but still admire for her taste in men) and boop Mortimer's snoot for me. 🥂
Had to Google Lukas Nelson. At first I was like, a country band formed in LA ... er, this seems like a bad sign... then I saw the Neil Young connection, and I was like, this is going on my spotify. Thank you, Jessica!
So did John Denver ( 1971 ) when he said "Blow up your TV, throw away your paper, go to the country, build you a home.Plant a little garden, eat a lot of peaches..."
God love him, John Prine. I miss him all the time. And fuck the weasel(s) who could have prevented John and the rest of the country from COVID-19. Anyway, time to listen and play “Dear Abby.”
“In my experience, the winning party in an American election over-reaches and underperforms, while reports of the losing party’s demise are greatly exaggerated.”
I don't know if you come by this experience by following Congress closely. I started getting really into Congress during the push that ultimately resulted in Obamacare. PBS has excellent coverage (Lisa Desjardins is damn good at her job). Anyway, I've gained a real appreciation for the delta between a campaign promise and what actually results in lasting legislation.
Lisa is great and was harrowing to watch when she was at the Capitol during Jan. 6 (on PBS, too!)...Team Trump doesn't understand how legislation works, even within their own bloc. This is gonna be a four-year shitshow of "do nothing but grift."
I am resilient. My disabilities and my psycho mother made me resilient from a very early age.
Working through a minefield of hidden pockets of ableism at my supposedly liberal employer‘s hotbed of hypocrisy made me resilient.
But, sometimes it is all a little too much. Your resilience reserves get tapped out, and you feel like people have lived up to your worst suspicions about them.
So yeah, we’ll all pull our socks up and keep going, but it’s going to be in the back of my mind that the Orange Menace has far fewer guardrails than he did last time and things could turn to shit faster.
With you on all of this Teri. And I don't think that "going forward" or carrying on means complacency, acceptance, or that we're just "getting over it." It just means we are very clear eyed and focused.
Yes I’m resilient but I’m so fucking tired of having to be so. This week has sucked and the grief cloud is beginning to lift. I heard Nancy Pelosi say we’re not here to agonize, we’re here to organize, and I’m with that. Also, after I walked around my red-again state and glared suspiciously at everyone for how they must have voted, I’m leaning into the fact that misinformation and lies swayed my neighbors, friends, family, — so the politicians who stoke fear based on lies are the ones who deserve my disrespect.
Thank you for this comment, Robin. I was really struck by what you said about looking at your neighbors with suspicion. I think that's the very thing we're up against. It is the politics of division right in front of our eyes. We don't have to accept it, though. One thing I tell myself when I get those feelings is that people are very complicated and reducing everything we think about the direction of our country down to a choice between two people every four years really is a tall order.
Yes, I agree and I’m trying to catch myself and not play along with the divisions that will help those who are gaining power now. We are in for a rough time of it, I’m afraid. Thank you for your writing, it will help keep us all sane!
Very well said. I did much the same the next day. I was pissed, disappointed, saddened and frankly, a little frightened. But my animals needed feeding, the leaves needed blowing, and the TV needed watching. Mundanity reigned and that’s what helps. And you are spot on about the country. Lest we forget, this is the United States of America, not just America. We aren’t totally defined by our allegiance to DC or the orange clown.
My mom and her kin fled the old country because of bad things and my dad and his kin lived through the Great Depression including a flood that wiped out their business so yeah resilience lets go. And man I’ve been craving donuts. There’s a Cambodian restaurant in town called Tans with a family serving up steaming bowls of noodle soup with mystery meat (chicken not pieces of shit tho) and at some point they threw donuts on the menu and now it’s the most popular donut spot in town and I will go there.
I love this comment, Andrew! I don't know if you know this, but many of the donut shops in Los Angeles are owned by Cambodians. There's actually a doc about it that's probably on Netflix. I have no doubt that the donuts bring in the crowds.
So well said and I really appreciated this. I was also really hoping to see a photo of Morty at the end. The doggos are such a source of joy and comfort right now. Give him an extra treat for me <3
The thing that helps me be resilient is my creativity, and I expect that's true for most people. Imagining a better place, physically and emotionally, reminds us that it's possible - and that makes it worth it to get back up on our feet. Thank you!
Michael, you are exactly right when you say, “In my experience, the winning party in an American election over-reaches and underperforms, while reports of the losing party’s demise are greatly exaggerated.” The history of American politics in my lifetime is like a compressor pedal. Stick with me. As you probably know, a compressor pedal sits between the guitar and the amp and when it’s on, it makes the loud parts not so loud and the quiet parts not so quiet. Things even out. I couldn’t tell you what functions as the compressor pedal in our political system, but I’m pretty confident there is one, and I’m hoping it’s still plugged in.
Thanks T.D.! I'll take a stab at what functions as the compressor pedal. First and foremost, we have local and state governments. The typical American has far more contact with state and local than they do federal; or put another way, the closer the government is to you, the bigger its impact.
We also compress, or maybe fragment, power across state and federal systems, where we have three branches. I know folks get upset about the Supreme Court -- I get upset about the Supreme Court -- but that's not where the most ball games are played, i.e., trial courts and intermediate appellate courts will decide far more cases than the Supreme Court decides. Quick aside to illustrate the point: I knew an appellate judge who reversed the same trial court judge quite often. But the two judges had a friendly relationship. At some point the appellate judge said, "I'm surprised you're always so friendly, because I often reverse your rulings." The trial judge smiled and said, "Don't worry about it, I reverse your rulings every single day." One judge has the power to say what the law means broadly, but the other has the power to carry it out. So you tell me who has the power. Answer: both. Point being, we often think about power as hierarchies in the U.S., but power is actually a lot more fragmented. Or compressed! I do love that analogy. And everything I've mentioned here is just part of government power. There are also administrative agencies -- local, state, and federal.
There's also A LOT of power in the private sector. For all the bitching about free speech online, the truth is that the platform's terms of service have a lot more power than the 1st amendment. I could go on. But you get my point. America is really big & really powerful and that power is incredibly decentralized. We all learn this in school, but the way we talk about elections, you'd think the oval office was the only office in the land.
Revenge is my religion. Living a good life and helping others to do the same in the face of stupidity and meanness is the best revenge I can think of.
This is good advice, David. Sometimes I see a knee-jerk reaction comments like this one, as if you need to be doing something *more* to make the world a better place. While there's always more that can be done (and the more is really important), how we live and treat each other matters a lot.
It’s a damn fine form of revenge, David. :)
Well fuck, indeed. 💜
My first labor and delivery was like something out of a horror movie. And I went the natural route. Because I'm Superwoman (or an idiot). I think about that whole experience (because you don't have the luxury of forgetting what happened when you don't use the drugs) when I'm faced with something scary or "impossible" and worry (foolishly) that I won't survive it.
I appreciate you, Michael. Please hug Christina (who I've never met, but still admire for her taste in men) and boop Mortimer's snoot for me. 🥂
Meg, you are resilient as fuck. I very much appreciate you, too.
Turns out Lukas Nelson had it right all along: “Turn off the news and build a garden.”
Had to Google Lukas Nelson. At first I was like, a country band formed in LA ... er, this seems like a bad sign... then I saw the Neil Young connection, and I was like, this is going on my spotify. Thank you, Jessica!
So did John Denver ( 1971 ) when he said "Blow up your TV, throw away your paper, go to the country, build you a home.Plant a little garden, eat a lot of peaches..."
John Denver! Hell yes!
John Denver may have covered it but John Prine wrote it. Spanish Pipedream.
👍🏻🌿
God love him, John Prine. I miss him all the time. And fuck the weasel(s) who could have prevented John and the rest of the country from COVID-19. Anyway, time to listen and play “Dear Abby.”
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=BofvfVPFbiM
Now this song makes SO MUCH MORE SENSE! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3GCrzjVdmSg
This has been my experience too:
“In my experience, the winning party in an American election over-reaches and underperforms, while reports of the losing party’s demise are greatly exaggerated.”
I don't know if you come by this experience by following Congress closely. I started getting really into Congress during the push that ultimately resulted in Obamacare. PBS has excellent coverage (Lisa Desjardins is damn good at her job). Anyway, I've gained a real appreciation for the delta between a campaign promise and what actually results in lasting legislation.
Lisa is great and was harrowing to watch when she was at the Capitol during Jan. 6 (on PBS, too!)...Team Trump doesn't understand how legislation works, even within their own bloc. This is gonna be a four-year shitshow of "do nothing but grift."
Incredibly harrowing! And absolutely on the grift. Gonna be a shit show.
Let’s just hope it leans heavily to the do nothing side!
They’ll try and then give up. (Personally I don’t think dear leader makes it alive through 4 years. Or he’s ousted in an internal coup.)
It sucks. Thanks for sharing the pain. It helps. We need to hunker down with ourselves.
Here are my suggestions for resiliency
https://www.tonibrayermd.com/post/how-to-protect-your-mental-heath
I really enjoyed this and the quail-on-Buddha really dropped my blood pressure ❤️❤️
Dr Brayer you are wildly qualified to be followed! Just read your About page in your blog, and subscribed of course!
Thank you for sharing this, Toni!
I am resilient. My disabilities and my psycho mother made me resilient from a very early age.
Working through a minefield of hidden pockets of ableism at my supposedly liberal employer‘s hotbed of hypocrisy made me resilient.
But, sometimes it is all a little too much. Your resilience reserves get tapped out, and you feel like people have lived up to your worst suspicions about them.
So yeah, we’ll all pull our socks up and keep going, but it’s going to be in the back of my mind that the Orange Menace has far fewer guardrails than he did last time and things could turn to shit faster.
Well said, Teri. And for what it's worth, every word of your comment illustrated grit.
Thanks, Michael, I appreciate it.
With you on all of this Teri. And I don't think that "going forward" or carrying on means complacency, acceptance, or that we're just "getting over it." It just means we are very clear eyed and focused.
Yes I’m resilient but I’m so fucking tired of having to be so. This week has sucked and the grief cloud is beginning to lift. I heard Nancy Pelosi say we’re not here to agonize, we’re here to organize, and I’m with that. Also, after I walked around my red-again state and glared suspiciously at everyone for how they must have voted, I’m leaning into the fact that misinformation and lies swayed my neighbors, friends, family, — so the politicians who stoke fear based on lies are the ones who deserve my disrespect.
Thank you for this comment, Robin. I was really struck by what you said about looking at your neighbors with suspicion. I think that's the very thing we're up against. It is the politics of division right in front of our eyes. We don't have to accept it, though. One thing I tell myself when I get those feelings is that people are very complicated and reducing everything we think about the direction of our country down to a choice between two people every four years really is a tall order.
Yes, I agree and I’m trying to catch myself and not play along with the divisions that will help those who are gaining power now. We are in for a rough time of it, I’m afraid. Thank you for your writing, it will help keep us all sane!
Very well said. I did much the same the next day. I was pissed, disappointed, saddened and frankly, a little frightened. But my animals needed feeding, the leaves needed blowing, and the TV needed watching. Mundanity reigned and that’s what helps. And you are spot on about the country. Lest we forget, this is the United States of America, not just America. We aren’t totally defined by our allegiance to DC or the orange clown.
Thank you, Tim.
My mom and her kin fled the old country because of bad things and my dad and his kin lived through the Great Depression including a flood that wiped out their business so yeah resilience lets go. And man I’ve been craving donuts. There’s a Cambodian restaurant in town called Tans with a family serving up steaming bowls of noodle soup with mystery meat (chicken not pieces of shit tho) and at some point they threw donuts on the menu and now it’s the most popular donut spot in town and I will go there.
I love this comment, Andrew! I don't know if you know this, but many of the donut shops in Los Angeles are owned by Cambodians. There's actually a doc about it that's probably on Netflix. I have no doubt that the donuts bring in the crowds.
I did not know that! Cambodians have seen some shit.
Truth. I visited Cambodia. Beautiful heartbreaking resilient country
Donuts AND noodles? OMG. Carb heaven...
Some damn good innovation right there.
Yes, I am resilience, I did yoga for over 10 years until that studio closed.
😂😂😂
So well said and I really appreciated this. I was also really hoping to see a photo of Morty at the end. The doggos are such a source of joy and comfort right now. Give him an extra treat for me <3
Thanks Emmy! Will do on the treat. And I'll try and include a photo of him in an upcoming situation normal
Am I the only one with a craving for some burrito journalism? C’mon people, let’s do this!
Best comment.
The thing that helps me be resilient is my creativity, and I expect that's true for most people. Imagining a better place, physically and emotionally, reminds us that it's possible - and that makes it worth it to get back up on our feet. Thank you!
Very well said!
Viva la Resilience!
I couldn’t face reading this until now. You actually gave me hope.
Thank you
Thank you for sharing that with me, Luanne! I really appreciate that.
Michael, you are exactly right when you say, “In my experience, the winning party in an American election over-reaches and underperforms, while reports of the losing party’s demise are greatly exaggerated.” The history of American politics in my lifetime is like a compressor pedal. Stick with me. As you probably know, a compressor pedal sits between the guitar and the amp and when it’s on, it makes the loud parts not so loud and the quiet parts not so quiet. Things even out. I couldn’t tell you what functions as the compressor pedal in our political system, but I’m pretty confident there is one, and I’m hoping it’s still plugged in.
Thanks T.D.! I'll take a stab at what functions as the compressor pedal. First and foremost, we have local and state governments. The typical American has far more contact with state and local than they do federal; or put another way, the closer the government is to you, the bigger its impact.
We also compress, or maybe fragment, power across state and federal systems, where we have three branches. I know folks get upset about the Supreme Court -- I get upset about the Supreme Court -- but that's not where the most ball games are played, i.e., trial courts and intermediate appellate courts will decide far more cases than the Supreme Court decides. Quick aside to illustrate the point: I knew an appellate judge who reversed the same trial court judge quite often. But the two judges had a friendly relationship. At some point the appellate judge said, "I'm surprised you're always so friendly, because I often reverse your rulings." The trial judge smiled and said, "Don't worry about it, I reverse your rulings every single day." One judge has the power to say what the law means broadly, but the other has the power to carry it out. So you tell me who has the power. Answer: both. Point being, we often think about power as hierarchies in the U.S., but power is actually a lot more fragmented. Or compressed! I do love that analogy. And everything I've mentioned here is just part of government power. There are also administrative agencies -- local, state, and federal.
There's also A LOT of power in the private sector. For all the bitching about free speech online, the truth is that the platform's terms of service have a lot more power than the 1st amendment. I could go on. But you get my point. America is really big & really powerful and that power is incredibly decentralized. We all learn this in school, but the way we talk about elections, you'd think the oval office was the only office in the land.
Amen!