I love my dad. I don’t love everything he says or thinks, but I love my dad because he’s my dad.
He’s also the 77 year old racist in the Vietnam veterans cap who won’t eat Vietnamese food. I am mortified when he says random stuff in public because he’s developing dementia and has no filter. But he’s also the man asleep in the chair next to my mom’s hospital bed when she had cancer surgery. The man who watches the neighbors’ dogs when they go out of town and helps strangers stranded on the side of the road.
The man who won’t eat bahn mi was once a 18 year old who got sent halfway around the world because he said he wanted to graduate from the same high school he started at, which meant his dad had to re-enlist and immediately got sent to Vietnam. His mom blamed him for that. He went because he’d probably get drafted anyway and at least his dad could come home if he dropped out of school and lived up to the patriotic bullshit he’d been force fed his whole life.
Only to meet one night in a tunnel nose to nose with another teenager sent to kill him and to face real death for the first time. To squeak through a year of hell (including putting pieces of his buddies in body bags) only to turn over command of a platoon of similar kids to his best friend on his way back home, a friend who died a few hours later in his same seat on the gun jeep because they missed a mine on a sweep of a dirt road trying to get a supply convoy to its destination. I heard him screaming in his sleep about it last night.
You see a racist old man. I see him too, and I see my dad. It’s mortifying and all I can do is try to change the subject and focus him on something else before too many others hear him. And pray for a little forgiveness.
I don’t know what else to say. Thanks for reading this.
Meridith! This is a beautiful comment. Thank you for sharing so much about your dad. I wanted to give some of that perspective by talking about my Zayde, but you’ve gone so much deeper here. Thank you!
Meredith— thank you for this. Could’ve written the same thing about my stepdad. He eased up a bit towards the end of his life, but in a lot of ways he never came home.
That couple is depressing. We lived in Vietnam for three months and as Americans we were worried the Vietnamese might hold a grudge -- as they very well could! Nope, didn't bat an eye. Lovely people.
We had a similar worry when we were in Cambodia. I totally would've understood a grudge. But it was just the opposite. We had so many positive experiences, even when we found ourselves in difficult conversations about war and genocide. We met several people who had strong feelings about U.S. policy in the 1970s, but those feelings didn't extend to American people.
That vegan banh mi is really fucking good. I'm ordering one today. And, yes, fuck racism. Ima punch a nazi today if I see one on the way to pick up my banh mi.
That’s a lot of questions and I have a short memory so I’ll stick with the sandwich aspect: the best sandwich in the world is the Rajun Cajun at the Other Coast Cafe in Ballard, Seattle. Sure you need a shower after eating it because the spicy mayo drips down your arms. And sure you have a sore mouth for a week from the toasted baguette scraping the skin off the roof of your mouth. But….it’s amazing.
2) I just walked by the taco bell CANTINA upscale restaurant I tried once, nine years ago. What a pile of feces.
4) I used to work by a mendo. It's expensive but good. I often brought my racist friend. He's an economics PhD so it's to change the subject to something else he's wrong about (misogyny, classism, ageism, how our 401k plan works, etc.).
I make my own food as I have a plethora of intolerances. Because of your last Taco post I’ve been on a Mexican food kick. Last night we had gf burritos with grilled chicken, onion, black beans, lettuce, salsa and Avacado. Really messy and yummy.
I had a black friend who wouldn’t drink Coke because they supported apartheid in S Africa 40 years ago.
A wealthy Jewish guy I knew refused to buy a Mercedes because it was Hitler’s car. In both instances I am positive those companies have been thru many CEOs and Board of Directors’.
Food Racism. It's there for when all the other versions are claimed.
How can you choose to not like a cuisine because of its cultural origins? It's just fucking FOOD.
I'm also really hungry having just read this - and very jealous, as there's (surprise!) not one of these places anywhere within a few thousand miles of my home! Mendocino Farms sounds like another reason that Tupac was right ... 'Let's show these fools how we do it over on this Westside/
'Cause you and I know it's the best side'. Vegan banh mi, indeed.
While your vegan Bahn mi DOES look fabulous, we have a Vietnamese inspired restaurant in tiny Freeland on Whidbey Island. They make killer pho (and have a neon sign in the window that reads "phoreeland")and the best pork Bahn mi, as well as the most killer meatloaf sandwich I have ever eaten in my entire life. If you're ever in the neighborhood I highly recommend it, Fare Market in Phoreeland WA.
Interesting take. I’ve (unfortunately) come across Mr. Clueless too many times to mention. But fair play, my wife and I experienced WAY more prejudice about our relationship in the Vietnamese community than we ever did outside it.
Chicago's favorite Italian Beef is the best sandwich. Locally in LA, The Godmother.
No matter where i't's served.tjhe Taco Bell Doritos Crunchy Gordita is not going to be authentic Mexican.
QR codes won't end til the direct mind control computers come along, but lately, I've gone to restaurants that are going back to printed menus.
Last Mendocino Farms visit, I had to Chimichurri Steak sandwich. No racism on that visit. And I don't think it's traditional Mexican.
My wife takes pictures of her food. I get stuck taking them when she wants a picture of what I ordered. I think it's a dumb thing to do other than when she's showing friends what she's cooked.
I love my dad. I don’t love everything he says or thinks, but I love my dad because he’s my dad.
He’s also the 77 year old racist in the Vietnam veterans cap who won’t eat Vietnamese food. I am mortified when he says random stuff in public because he’s developing dementia and has no filter. But he’s also the man asleep in the chair next to my mom’s hospital bed when she had cancer surgery. The man who watches the neighbors’ dogs when they go out of town and helps strangers stranded on the side of the road.
The man who won’t eat bahn mi was once a 18 year old who got sent halfway around the world because he said he wanted to graduate from the same high school he started at, which meant his dad had to re-enlist and immediately got sent to Vietnam. His mom blamed him for that. He went because he’d probably get drafted anyway and at least his dad could come home if he dropped out of school and lived up to the patriotic bullshit he’d been force fed his whole life.
Only to meet one night in a tunnel nose to nose with another teenager sent to kill him and to face real death for the first time. To squeak through a year of hell (including putting pieces of his buddies in body bags) only to turn over command of a platoon of similar kids to his best friend on his way back home, a friend who died a few hours later in his same seat on the gun jeep because they missed a mine on a sweep of a dirt road trying to get a supply convoy to its destination. I heard him screaming in his sleep about it last night.
You see a racist old man. I see him too, and I see my dad. It’s mortifying and all I can do is try to change the subject and focus him on something else before too many others hear him. And pray for a little forgiveness.
I don’t know what else to say. Thanks for reading this.
Meridith! This is a beautiful comment. Thank you for sharing so much about your dad. I wanted to give some of that perspective by talking about my Zayde, but you’ve gone so much deeper here. Thank you!
Meredith— thank you for this. Could’ve written the same thing about my stepdad. He eased up a bit towards the end of his life, but in a lot of ways he never came home.
That couple is depressing. We lived in Vietnam for three months and as Americans we were worried the Vietnamese might hold a grudge -- as they very well could! Nope, didn't bat an eye. Lovely people.
We had a similar worry when we were in Cambodia. I totally would've understood a grudge. But it was just the opposite. We had so many positive experiences, even when we found ourselves in difficult conversations about war and genocide. We met several people who had strong feelings about U.S. policy in the 1970s, but those feelings didn't extend to American people.
Woh…that sandwich looks great! You should write a book of quotes. Just from today:
“Because even after the fighting stops, the hate always seems to endure.”
“Racism is a cudgel used to deny dignity and opportunity to people labeled as “other.”
“Racism is a cancer that rots society from the inside.”
“ Why is she saying racist shit to me? Do I look like a fellow traveler?”
Howto create your own QR code (static, which is just a link or dynamic which is trackable):
https://www.wikihow.com/Create-a-QR-Code
Thanks! Feel free to highlight and restack any of those, if you like.
That vegan banh mi is really fucking good. I'm ordering one today. And, yes, fuck racism. Ima punch a nazi today if I see one on the way to pick up my banh mi.
Enjoy!
That’s a lot of questions and I have a short memory so I’ll stick with the sandwich aspect: the best sandwich in the world is the Rajun Cajun at the Other Coast Cafe in Ballard, Seattle. Sure you need a shower after eating it because the spicy mayo drips down your arms. And sure you have a sore mouth for a week from the toasted baguette scraping the skin off the roof of your mouth. But….it’s amazing.
Oooo. I’m south of Seattle. I will have to see if it can be made free of a few allergy items.
FYI there is a Mendocino Farms in Emeryville— which is en route from the Oakland Airport to San Rafael. 5333 Adeline St
Emeryville, CA 94608
I’m going to check out that vegan banh mi.
Enjoy!
2) I just walked by the taco bell CANTINA upscale restaurant I tried once, nine years ago. What a pile of feces.
4) I used to work by a mendo. It's expensive but good. I often brought my racist friend. He's an economics PhD so it's to change the subject to something else he's wrong about (misogyny, classism, ageism, how our 401k plan works, etc.).
How can one man be so wrong about so much? Don’t answer that. I know that man. Not literally, but we all know the type.
Should read "it's easy to"
QR codes as an option - fine.
QR codes because they outright refuse to provide a physical menu - bye.
You can get a physical menu at Mendo, so they stay on my list. Thankfully!
Mendocino sounds rad. Wish we had one in WA.
I make my own food as I have a plethora of intolerances. Because of your last Taco post I’ve been on a Mexican food kick. Last night we had gf burritos with grilled chicken, onion, black beans, lettuce, salsa and Avacado. Really messy and yummy.
I had a black friend who wouldn’t drink Coke because they supported apartheid in S Africa 40 years ago.
A wealthy Jewish guy I knew refused to buy a Mercedes because it was Hitler’s car. In both instances I am positive those companies have been thru many CEOs and Board of Directors’.
Mendo is rad. I also know lots of older Jews who won’t buy German.
I used to live near a Mendocino Farms. Love that place! The Vegan Bahn Mi if s a go-to. I also enjoy the Sandwich Study of Heat.
No racism there that I can recall, but who knows what future visits may bring!
I don’t know that sandwich. I always want to try other stuff, but I don’t want to cheat on the bahn mi.
Most American Tacos aren't genuine tacos. The Mexican Taco is closer to what we'd call a burrito. The taquito is closer to a chalupa rolled up. lol.
But that doesn't stop me from ordering three tacos and two enchiladas when I eat at a Mexican restaurant.
Food Racism. It's there for when all the other versions are claimed.
How can you choose to not like a cuisine because of its cultural origins? It's just fucking FOOD.
I'm also really hungry having just read this - and very jealous, as there's (surprise!) not one of these places anywhere within a few thousand miles of my home! Mendocino Farms sounds like another reason that Tupac was right ... 'Let's show these fools how we do it over on this Westside/
'Cause you and I know it's the best side'. Vegan banh mi, indeed.
Loved this post.
Tupac was way ahead of his time.
A prophet.
While your vegan Bahn mi DOES look fabulous, we have a Vietnamese inspired restaurant in tiny Freeland on Whidbey Island. They make killer pho (and have a neon sign in the window that reads "phoreeland")and the best pork Bahn mi, as well as the most killer meatloaf sandwich I have ever eaten in my entire life. If you're ever in the neighborhood I highly recommend it, Fare Market in Phoreeland WA.
I need to be in that neighborhood!
You would be there every day. It's the best thing that ever happened to Phoreeland. It would be worth a vacation here just for Fare Market.
Interesting take. I’ve (unfortunately) come across Mr. Clueless too many times to mention. But fair play, my wife and I experienced WAY more prejudice about our relationship in the Vietnamese community than we ever did outside it.
I miss the Indian wrap they used to have at Mendo… that was my favorite on their menu!
I don’t think I ever tried it. Bummer that it’s gone. What do you get now?
Chicago's favorite Italian Beef is the best sandwich. Locally in LA, The Godmother.
No matter where i't's served.tjhe Taco Bell Doritos Crunchy Gordita is not going to be authentic Mexican.
QR codes won't end til the direct mind control computers come along, but lately, I've gone to restaurants that are going back to printed menus.
Last Mendocino Farms visit, I had to Chimichurri Steak sandwich. No racism on that visit. And I don't think it's traditional Mexican.
My wife takes pictures of her food. I get stuck taking them when she wants a picture of what I ordered. I think it's a dumb thing to do other than when she's showing friends what she's cooked.