63 Comments

Hi Michael, loved the snow in LA story!

Now I don't mean to be picky. Actually, maybe I do, since swear word grammar is of particular interest to me.

When you said 'While my fellow Angelenos shit their pants and took to social media to sound apocalyptic alarms' ... sure it should not have been 'While my fellow Angelenos SHAT their pants and took to social media to sound apocalyptic alarms'?

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Hi Keith! First, thanks for reading, as always.

Second, you're asking a really important question. But since I've never been confused with a grammar expert, I'm going to go with Google. According to Grammarist, both uses are correct, but the common usage is "shat." (https://grammarist.com/usage/shat/) The Grammarist article points to examples of "shat" in such prestigious publications as The New Yorker, The Guardian, and The AV Club. OK, the AV Club isn't prestigious, but the point still stands: shat is the better choice. Anyway, I shat the bed here, and I thank you for calling this error to my attention.

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This is what ChatGPT had to say:

'Both sentences are grammatically correct, but the use of "shat" in the second sentence is in the past tense and might be seen as more appropriate in this context.

The first sentence uses "shit" in the present tense, which may imply ongoing or continuous action, while the second sentence uses "shat" in the past tense, which suggests a completed action. Ultimately, the choice between the two would depend on the specific context and the intended meaning.'

The issue of course is that ChatGPT likes to lie. So is this true? Or is it just another example of a once-and-future AI Overlord laughing at us while we defecate on the bedlinen?

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We should always defer to the machine. Nothing will go wrong that way. 😁

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1. It’s Los Angeles, pal. I lived there when they were shooting the Alien Nation movie and all the storefronts around Western and Hollywood had signs in a language that looked like EKGs. Who knows?

2. Yes.

3. Put your hand on your forehead. Is there a horn? If so, then yes. Or the Jewish husband answer: if your wife says you’re a unicorn, start prancing and farting rainbows.

4. The other two original Wailers.

5. Ask why goyim get their own paint color.

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I think the paint color was supposed to be gentle, but Zach assures me that the person who entered that typo into the store's computer system most likely doesn't know words like gentile or goyim.

But your answers raise a much more important issue, for me anyway. You lived in Hollywood in the 80s. Do you remember a hamburger stand on Vine called Molly's? I went there a lot with my dad. I think the burgers were good, but that could just be happy memories. Believe it or not--you'll believe it, I'm sure--the lot where Molly's stood is now a really fancy condo, but the block is as messed up as it ever was.

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Its supposed to be Gentian Violet

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That makes sense! Thanks!

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That begs the question: are they offering Lady Violet as well?

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In the 80's I lived in San Gabriel, and later Long Beach. I made my "living" as an extra, so spent time in Hollywood. I don't remember Molly's, but I do remember Pioneer Chicken on Sunset. They sold a Bucket O' Gizzards that I loved and could afford.

I moved back to L.A. 2013-2019, lived in Monrovia (in 'the other Valley').

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I remember that Pioneer Chicken stand! And if I'm not mistaken, it's the one Warren Zevon sang about in Carmelita.

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I've always thought that was the one in the song! Of course, it was a chain, so it could have been a different one. But that one was perfect for Carmelita, since Hollywood has always been the perfect place to be strung out on heroin - or so I've heard.

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I’m pretty sure that’s the one because I think it was the only pioneer chicken in the area. Plus, the song references the area between Hollywood and Echo Park, which puts us pretty close to Warren’s Pioneer Chicken stand, I think.

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So I looked up the Wikipedia page for Pioneer Chicken (because of course I did), and the first location was in Echo Park. So, unless we hold a seance to ask Mr. Zevon, we’ll never know.

By the way, I’m listening to the version by Flaco Jimenez and Dwight Yoakam right now.

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Do you think the snowstorm that hit Los Angeles is a sign of the coming apocalypse or was this whole thing an elaborate special effect shot for a new Roland Emmerich film?

I think an apocalypse is inevitable; watch the evening news.

OK, but for real, snow in Los Angeles is bonkers, and we've messed up this planet, right?

Yes, we've messed up this planet.

3. Given my family's long-ish, but really in the grand scheme of things, not very long-at-all history in Los Angeles, is Christina right? Am I a unicorn?

I refuse to answer that on the fifth amendment.

Seriously, who shot the deputy? Leave your tips and unhinged conspiracy theories in the comments.

I think the depute was a victim of crossfire between the Sheriff and the narrator.

What else should I ask ChatGTP?

What is the answer to 3x + 1?

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There's are A+ answers, Norman!

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That snowball fight story is an elite dad joke. Glad the Leone profile has momentum, it has a great insider/outsider blend in perspective. You don't have a stake in portraying the industry in any particular light, but know the landscape personally. I hope that the puritan siege you were dealing with has abated a little.

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The siege has lifted! The puritans have moved on to the next outrage.

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“Ive been messing around with ChatGTP, a predictive text AI that makes every human who uses it seem a lot less cool.” Oh man, it’s true!!!

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Thankfully, I’ve never been cool, so I have what you might call a natural immunity to the side effects of ChatGTP.

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As someone who has a similar history, but only back to both sets of grandparents in O.C. I think you're a unicorn for going back one extra generation. What brought your great-grandparents to L.A. originally? My maternal grandpa was stationed at the El Toro military based, which apparently was one of the biggest starts to suburbanization in O.C. back when, and my paternal grandpa literally came to O.C. on the flip of a dime (if the coin had flipped the other way he would have moved to NYC and I would definitely not exist).

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It's always nice to meet another unicorn! I'm glad that dime your paternal grandpa flipped landed on whatever side the West Coast had been assigned to. Was it heads or tails?

To answer you question, I'm not sure what brought my great grandparents on my mom's side to LA. I believe they had some family here. They were coming from North Dakota and before that my ancestors on that side were Polish Jews. They sold furs, which seem like the kind of thing people need in Poland and North Dakota, but more like a luxury item in LA. My hunch is, some of their distant relatives told them they could make good money and enjoy great weather by coming out here and selling furs to early Hollywood types. As I understand it, they did pretty well for themselves, but then lost most of their money in the Depression. My maternal grandma was born in Winnipeg, Canada. There's a small Jewish community there and it's connected to the small Jewish community in Fargo. I believe my LA relatives kept in touch, via letters, with people back in Fargo. When my grandfather got out of the army at the end of WW2, he wanted to get married, or maybe his parents wanted him to get married, or maybe both. It wasn't exactly an arranged marriage, but somehow word was passed from LA, to Fargo, to Winnipeg, and my grandfather, Joe, went to Canada, where he met Eve, who he married right away so he could bring her back to LA.

My dad's side doesn't go back as far in LA. His father came here when he was 17. Before that he spent a year in San Francisco working in a shoe factory. He hated it, and I think he had an older brother who worked in a grocery store and that sounded pretty good to my grandpa. He worked in a grocery store for about a decade, then started his own store. Before SF, he was born and raised in Harbin, Manchuria, which is where his family fled during the Russian revolution. Honestly, I wish I knew more. One of these days I want to do some genealogy research, and if I can find the time and the money, I'd love to get to Harbin to see what I can learn about the small community of Russian Jews that my family was a part of. As for my grandma on that side, I know she was born in Brooklyn, and I think she came to LA during the depression for work and for the weather.

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My paternal grandpa also came from North Dakota!!! (the dime guy, hah). He's Norwegian though and the source of my unpronounceable last name. I've always been told there's a "Sjule" street or road somewhere in North Dakota and I've always wanted to visit there too 🤯.

That's so cool about the furs, it makes so much sense to come down to L.A. from North Dakota to sell to the nou·veau riche celebrities. I've never thought of such a history, I really love that Michael, thank you for sharing! I love learning about family history, it is endlessly interesting to me.

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This probably didn’t happen, but what if your people and my people came out to Southern California together on the same train, and the brought the lox and my people brought the bagels, and everyone had a lovely trip?

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I refuse to believe any other reality moving forward.

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I think we've both made the right choice, just like our grandparents.

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After Michigan had not one but two massive ice storms that simultaneously involved thunder and lightening and all the trees became so heavy that limbs crashed down like bombs crushing cars and roofs and power lines so that 650,000 were living in freezing cold houses for a week,I'm inclined to go with The Coming Apocalypse!

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Apocalypse it is! But something tells me the people of Michigan are much better prepared for a new ice age than the people of California.

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You would think so...but apparently our power companies are not!

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Nice. I grew up in Ojai, 90 miles northeast of LA. Mom grew up in Pacific Palisades. Dad in Malibu. Uncle is still in Venice Beach. I remember wild, anarchic, drunken punk shows circa 2000 at The Troubadour!

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Nice! I think I go to Ojai more than Venice these days.

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I need a trip to Ojai right now myself

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Originally from nowhere near LA so I'm used to snow. Great story writing and timing.

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Thanks Scott!

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I love meeting fellow LA originals. My parents moved there in 1959, raising their three girls in Encino. I'm one of the first "valley girls." My step ma who is 84 grew up in Hollywood. I don't remember 1983 snow. Maybe my sis will comment. She's a recent normie too and still resides in LA. Love that your gramps played football with a leather helmet. Any pics?

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No picks of him playing football that I know of. One possible reason is he didn’t tell his parents he was playing. They found out when he broke his nose running into a goal post. That ended his very brief football career.

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I grew up in Northridge. I remember the snow. Not that big a deal.... it happens once in awhile cuz weather is famously unpredictable. You still get to be a unicorn :-)

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As long as I still get to be a unicorn I’m good 😁😁😁

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Who put the ram in the Rama Lama Ding Dong?

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Good question!

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I realize this is off topic, but I need to visit that Pasadena arcade!! How did I not know this existed??

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I don't know, but Neon is awesome!

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Hi Michael- loved this issue ! Loved that the snowball fight was over the one snowball ! You might be a unicorn - you are certainly unique in this world but I fear without the horn and the rainbow aura you’re just one heckuva good guy ! Although I concur with CL Steiner above, that if your wife says you’re a unicorn, carpe’ diem and start prancing around, rainbows overhead.

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Thank you, Marlene! I'm going to continue to accept Christina's usage of the word unicorn as it pertains to my family's LA history, but I'm also on the look out for a good unicorn filter for my zoom calls.

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1 and 2. I've lived in New Hampshire my entire life, so don't talk to me about snow. 🙄 For us the sign of the apocalypse is the freak heat waves we experience (60 degrees max) in January and February that have people walking around in shorts and tank tops like it's freaking Spring Break.

3. You are most definitely a unicorn, Michael. But you'd be one anywhere. I hope you take that as a compliment. 😊

4. Deputy is a weird looking word.

5. You know very well what I want you to ask ChatGTP. https://open.spotify.com/track/1KONmY3enP3r3nIPQidWAy?si=148faeb3616040bb

You might also ask it: "Where do you get off making traditional publishing even more of a shit show than it was before? How do you sleep at night? And what the actual fuck is your problem anyway?"

6. You didn't ask a question about paint colors, but I recently was thumbing through a BHG magazine at my mom's house and was introduced to a shade called "Mayonnaise". WHY???😦

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Something tells me you're going to get an answer to #5 next week. Is the traditional publishing question related to the thing that happened with Tor.com submissions, or is there another shit show happening in publishing? It's hard to keep track of all the shit shows in that industry.

As for the unicorn thing, I take it as a compliment. Then again, unicorn would be a really weird insult. Have you ever come across a scenario where unicorn was a negative? I haven't.

Mayonnaise paint?? No, just no. I mean, it describes a shade of white, but it also describes a situation where the customer is likely to pick a different shade, or maybe go to another paint store. And to be clear, I'm pro-mayo, both the condiment and the clinic. But I don't want mayo on my walls.

Deputy is a weird word. I was once the deputy editor at a publication and I made a lot of jokes about being deputized, but nobody laughed.

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that shit about the one snowball hysterical thnx whole piece of a piece

im curious to know which EXACT "rivers" of the "MANY" Bob was preparing to cross......aslo who was Mick referring to in "Sweet Virginia" ?

i could go on and on but no doubt you already suspect (half correctly) im a BOT

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I wasn't getting bot vibes at all because a bot could never write "bacon is the chocolate of meats."

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that mean u subscribe? might as well cuz soon ill wander into danger zone and flip switch like DR. No i get bored ez

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Saw it on your profile. But now I’m gonna subscribe just to keep an eye on you.

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ok IF you subscribe and thus far no hard evidence of THAT and besides you aint missin shit (yet) in light of the Kimia jumble thing he did over in BAT i would need to have own acronym and damned i nearly have BITCOIN but would have to settle for BITCOM....sooooo close and yet sooooo far

i cudda been a contender

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I just subscribed, mostly because i think you don't want me too, and reverse psychology sometimes works on me.

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