41 Comments

People who cut lines and apologise but then continue to be a dick are a unique type of person. I think she was both dumb and playing it - leaning into her role and hoping to get away with it. I usually remain calm on the outside, but my first looks like this gif (mostly because I fear confrontation and that someone might hit me if I tell them off): https://tenor.com/view/angry-fist-angry-fist-arthur-arthur-fist-anger-gif-7354160

Thank god for woman-behind-the-counter. There's a level of boldness you get when you are on the other side.

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Love the GIF, Natalie! I just wish Substack supported GIFs in the comments. Maybe I'll cut in line during their next product roadmap and make that suggestion :)

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MANY YEARS AGO I encountered a line-cutter. The person behind me in the line spoke up to the server saying something like, excuse me I am a regular customer and if you cannot serve us in order you have lost my business forever. I am still waiting for the opportunity to say it. It was said with a calm voice and the line-cutter did step back. When the behavior occurs, I often think of that chance encounter. There are wonderful ways to handle almost any situation and it is lucky when we get examples of the right way to say things.

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The person who said that is a real hero of social norms. We need more people like them.

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I still remember and thought it was so great. He was not adversarial. He was merely direct with no fanfare. You have to be willing to walk away from a nice plate of daal though...

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Around 10 years ago I started calling myself a "meat minimalist" -- I think it sounds better than "bad vegetarian";)

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I go with the flow but don't buy much meat unless that is what is offered. I am therefore an "opportunarian"

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Nice!

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I agree, Jillian! Meat minimalist sounds way better! Thanks for sharing that!

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“Instead of cooking a serving of ground beef and another serving of mushrooms for Taco Tuesday, I made chicken tacos. Some people might call that a fail, but those people are judgmental assholes.”

Yes! I’d also like to point out that chicken is not so much a fail as a happy midway point between ground beef and mushrooms.

And what is going on with this lady is a cherished notion she has that her general and pervasive thoughtlessness, which causes her and others so many problems, is a weakness of hers that the rest of us need to accommodate by providing her a permanent handicap spot in this parking lot we call life. There are a lot of people like that!

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“...this parking lot we call life.”👏👏👏

I’d also like to add that the chicken was NyQuil-free.

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Bravo. Now if a Philosophy 101 textbook were to contain more life truths such as this, the world would be a better place. I think I will try to eat tacos next Tuesday and I will keep the filling to myself :)

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Ha! The response to Affirm was heelarious. I suggest when Tuesday comes you email them and say that you're out in the parking lot and you can't find your designated parking spot. Plus you expected someone to be waiting there with a keycard so you could just breeze right into the building. Then perhaps berate them for the lousy way they treat executive employees!

I too once tried vegetarianism but was quickly overcome by the meat sweats detoxifying from my body. I then learned to eat lower on the food chain but still keep my Cholesterol at a decently high level to insure my wife can collect any death benefits while she's still reasonably young.

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I'm sure your wife appreciates the sacrifice :)

As for showing up at Affirm, if you see a story on the evening news about a entitled man demanding a parking pass and executive restroom key at a startup, you'll know your suggestion was taken to heart.

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I always ate vegetarian when flying internationally and when my Taiwan office ordered “lunch boxes”.

The vegetarian meals on flights used to be much more interesting and of course, didn’t include mystery meat. That screwed me once when the airline upgraded me to business class and the flight crew thoughtfully made sure my economy class meal was ready for me.

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That's a sound strategy.

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Hi Michael -- thanks for the shoutout to my Newsletter. I changed my diet and for me the results were immediate. Lost a ton of weight, cholesterol of a ten year old and just feel great. Always a food-LOVER so the adjustment seemed radical at the beginning. Now I've figured out how to mostly do it most of the time and that is good enough for me. Not into the politics of it. If people ask me if I'm a vegan, I say no, I wear a belt. I write about the food stuff occasionally but try to keep it light. I don't like being preached to and imagine most other people don't either.

The woman behind the counter is my hero. I laugh about the randomness of restaurant ratings. Her treatment of the line-cutter makes their place an automatic 5-star rating in my book. Eating out is an EXPERIENCE and she gave you one worth writing about!

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Thanks for the question, Mark! I hope more people follow your lead and write in with questions. Hint, hint!

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I've lost and kept off a ton of weight and still go to the State Fair -- it took a long time to get a routine of food I really enjoy and not feel like I was missing out. Its no longer a big deal for me. If something else for dinner I just make it work. I ask at places that offer vegetarian food if they can share a recipe and often they will. People are nice they just don't expect you to ask I think.

In a recent post I went crazy about beans. No one asked for a recipe. I kinda expected that :)

As to the questions, engagement and questions are really fun but tricky to pull off. If you don't mind stupid questions I am sure I could oblige occasionally.

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I thought I was at the height of my laughter when I arrived at “Some people might call that a fail, but those people are judgmental assholes.” But no. Your response to Sid might be the best thing I’ve read in a while! I often send snarky replies to the endless number of sales reps who aren’t content with sending me one solicitation a week, but I have to keep them a bit tame since I’m representing my company and I sort of need my paycheck.

Another great addition!

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Thank you, Holly! One of the benefits of being recruited for a job you couldn't do in a billion years is that I don't have to pull any punches.

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I now know what I am: an omnivore with plant-based tendencies. Thanks, I feel lighter just knowing this and knowing my tendencies are shared.

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Glad this helped!

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I try to avoid all “isms.”

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That’s a good policy!

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I think so. 🤓

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dude, i got you. i was veggie until i met "Greated_Parm" on Grindr. it's been a trip.

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😂😂😂

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The woman was dumb.... and an asshole.

When you start that job at Affirm be sure to use the bathroom in the manner you promised.

If you wanted something from Grindr and instead got a Grinder, you still probably ended up with something at least 6 inches long.

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I think she was genuinely disorganized at first, but then, seeing that she could get away with something, pushed as far as she could. What the lady needs to realize is that WE LIVE IN A SOCIETY. 🤡

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She’s got a lot of learning ahead of her.

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Wow, that Amran tool got roasted. Oh wait...

Good thoughts on vegetarianism. I'd like to do it, but with two small kids at home it's a tall order operationally. Eventually I hope to make the shift, or at least reduce to like one day eating meat per week. Absolutism is the quickest path to failure in most things.

Related to your job search, I think the next step is to play the email correspondence straight and have a legitimate phone interview where you then reveal it's all a big misunderstanding. That post writes itself!

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As the uncle of three boys who live on chicken in nugget form, I couldn't imagine trying to go veg with kids.

As for the job search, I love that idea and I even tried it once, but as the husband of a someone who does a lot of hiring, I felt really guilty about wasting their time. That said, it might happen one of these days 🤞

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What got me was the “my brothers and I”. Which implies at least 3 coaches for a high school water polo team.

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That was my thought too. I like to think that there's one coach per player, but I have no idea how many players there are on a water polo team.

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I'd really like to know if your shitpost/reply lands you that job. Make sure to keep us in the loop.

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Will do!

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I myself dabbled in vegetarianism once. Not in 'nam, of course

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This is comment perfection. You just won the internet, Alex!

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This is the exact right comment.

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A white Russian with oat milk DNW

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