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Oct 22, 2023·edited Oct 22, 2023Liked by Michael Estrin

Yeah, it started out as funny then became deep. That’s OK; I like the unexpectedness. It also has me pondering so nice job there.

In a somewhat similar vein (since you asked), I highly recommend two books which I believe are relatively objective. First is How Democracies Die(Steven Levitsky, Daniel Ziblatt). The second is Sapiens – A Brief History of Humankind (Yuval Noah Harari)

I am so sick of being mistaken for George Clooney. 😜

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Thank you, Darrell! I mean, thank you, George Clooney 😂

I'm a big fan of Sapiens, one of my favorite books. How Democracies Die has been on my list since it came out. I think I heard one of the authors interviewed. Anyway, your rec just moved it up in my TBR. Thank you!

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Great books Darrell!

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Oof, that's a lot to digest. I need a Tums, and some time to think. It's ringing true, but maybe that ringing is in my ears and not out in the world? I'll get back to you. Good stuff, Michael, as always.

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Thank you! It's a lot, I know. You don't need my permission, but go find something joyful. An ice cream cone. A nice walk. A movie. A chat with an old friend. The light things help you digest the heavy stuff, in my experience.

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I really feel for Klein. It’s too bad her doppelgänger wasn’t Campbell or Judd.

I have a name doppelgänger and an appearance one. I have a pretty uncommon last name that is almost never coupled with Amy, except that there is one other in the U.S. and she’s an artist and photographer from Texas. Constitutionally and geographically, she could not be further away from being my twin. But I send her good wishes whenever the Google alert set to my name sends me something about her instead of me. “Aww, look at other Amy go!” 😊

My appearance doppelgänger is eerily also named Amy. She has curly reddish hair and a facial bone structure much like mine. She also works in my former “industry,” albeit at a higher level. We would often get mistaken for one another at work-related meetings and events. At first, when people told me I looked like her, I scoffed and thought, “this is just another of the hundreds of times someone told me I looked EXACTLY like someone just because we both have red hair.” 🙄

But then about 15 years ago, I found myself sitting diagonally across the table from this other Amy at a statewide meeting, and I spent the whole time surreptitiously glancing at her because this time, she really DID look just like me. It was uncanny and rattled me on an existential level.

That “other Amy” and I have since actually talked and become Facebook friends. She is always telling me that she finds the comments from people about our “twin-ness” extremely flattering, because apparently she considers me more attractive than her (which then I find flattering - WEIRD!).

I loved your Jerry Garcia story and that you played along in the end 🤭. Seems very on-brand for you to do that 🩶

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Amy, you've got two great things going with two different doppelgängers! This is amazing! Thank you for sharing both of these doppelgängers!

I need to tell you something about Klein. I felt bad for her too when I started the book. It seemed awful to me that her identity and her work were being swallowed by her doppelgänger. But by the end of the book, I didn't feel sorry for Klein at all. I actually kind of felt happy for her. Here's why: Klein is all about getting to the core truth. That's been her whole career. Her doppelgänger story is what led her on a journey toward a deeper truth. Was it painful, weird, and absurd? Absolutely. But I'm glad Klein got so much out of it, and if anyone had to make that journey, I'm glad it was Klein because she really knows how to make sense of it. Anyway, I don't know if you're planning to read the book, but if you do I think you'll be fascinated by her journey, especially the last few chapters, which land in a very interesting personal space for Klein and her doppelgänger.

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You know, I read the Vanity Fair article Klein wrote about this and it very much felt like she took the high road by staying intellectually curious instead of resentful. A good lesson for us all. I think I know the answer, but would you recommend this book? After the VF article, I didn’t really feel like I needed to go deeper, but your post has me intrigued now.

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I would absolutely recommend this book! I heard her interviewed on Pivot and I thought, yeah that’s interesting, but I don’t need to read the book. My friend Lance changed my mind. The book goes to far deeper and more personal spaces than I could’ve predicted. And she goes there with so much honesty and compassion and curiosity. So yes, put this book on your list!

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*leaves Substack to go add book to Solstice wish list 🏃🏻‍♀️

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This was “Us” meets “Black Mirror.” This was good. Michael, you have so much range. I look forward to reading your work every Sunday.

My doppelgänger is living a life I hate, but secretly envy.

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Thank you, Marc! I'm so glad to have you here in the comments. I don't know your doppelgänger, but if you have a chance to talk with them, maybe you'll see that they hate / envy your life too, and maybe both of you have a laugh about it, see the other for real, and drop the baggage of hate and envy. Just a thought.

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Are you therapy services more or less than a subscription to Situation Normal? That right there is Gold.

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Legally, I can't charge for therapy since I'm not licensed. So the therapy rate is the same as the Situation Normal subscription. That said, even if you don't pay for SN, you get pretty much all of the benefits.

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After moving around money in my 401K and refinancing my mortgage - I am now a paid subscriber. In all serious, I love your work - first thing I read every Sunday before I roll out of bed.

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Bravo, Michael, this is one of the best things I've read & oh god did I ever NEED to read this & it is a timely & timeless response to our heartbreaking mess of a world.

A weird little masterpiece.

I'll be honest, I had no idea what I was getting into when I started reading this piece & despite my impulse to rn make a your piece needs a trigger warning joke that flatters this piece I am so glad that there weren't any warnings. I don't think I ever sensed the futility of social media the way I have this past week, & yr words were much needed salve for that wound.

Anyway, here is how I read your piece: I just woke up & put on the band Love's song "Always See Your Face' on repeat which is how I have started every day in recent weeks & then I flipped to Substack on my phone & started reading your piece on Naomi Klein's Doppelgänger (who I am rn trying to get as guest on podcast, Naomi Klein that is, not her doppelgänger) & really right from your opening sentences my heart jumped w excitement cuz I was like, "Oh shit, Michael's really going for Naomi Klein's

Doppelgänger, oh shit oh shit what's gonna happen?"

Becuz Naomi Klein is imho one of the greatest & most unique & valuable minds of our time & so you attempting to write abt her & her book in a meaningful way automatically puts you out on a precarious tightrope (I remember Marc Maron talking abt how nervous he was before interviewing her & how he dog-eared the shit out of her book, cuz Naomi Klein ain't nothing to f*ck with.)

Now fast forward many minutes & by this point I've read 3/5 through your piece, occasionally backing up to reread paragraphs (at one point thinking, Did this motherf*cker just just quote his old Facebook post to illustrate Klein's point & somehow make it WORK? Goddam it he did, jesus H that takes some moxie, what other crazy shit is Michael abt to try & pull off & where is this piece GOING? Cuz Lordy that is one high ass tightrope Michael done put himself on & the fall could be seriously brutal.)

And meanwhile the band Love's song Always See Your Face has just been playing on repeat & I barely notice & then somewhere around when I get to the below quoted passages of yr piece, something unexpected happens to me:

"So where are we going? The reason why I decided to write about Naomi Klein’s book this week is that she thinks we’re headed to a very bad place, if we don’t stop to question the ways in which we’re sorting ourselves into “us” and “them.” I agree with Klein’s thesis. I am living through a deadly “us” versus “them” moment, and I think you are too.

As I write these words, battles between “us” and “them” are raging everywhere. According to The Council on Foreign Relations, there are 27 active conflicts around the globe. But that number probably underestimates the number of conflicts in the world because war has an absurdly high threshold that ignores a lot of violence that’s just as horrific, but maybe not as noteworthy, for some reason or another.

Simmering just below the surface of all of that violence are the rhetorical fights that divide us too. As far as I know, nobody bothers counting those fights. The rhetorical conflicts we use to divide and conquer ourselves are as omnipresent to us as water is to fish. But if you want to see the water, social media is a good window. The weird ways we’ve networked billions of humans together via social media opened Klein’s eyes when so many people confused her with her doppelgänger. But even if social media hasn’t assigned you a doppelgänger, maybe you can still see what Klein sees."

Anyway, somewhere in the middle of reading your above passages, before I knew what was happening, I just started crying (kind of embarrassing to admit I started crying while reading a Substack post tbh esp one w goddam FB references & GIFs but it's the truth so fuckit) & then suddenly that song by the band Love "Always See Your Face" was booming in my ears while I kept reading & I was thinking oK wtf I am having a profound aesthetic experience rn wtf wtf & it feels like I'm being ambushed in best possible way rn & it's requiring all of me to be present for this & lemme be clear I wasn't crying bcuz I was sad tho there was little sadness of course (I mean Jesus there's a little sad in everything rn, to not feel that is deranged) but honestly there were like 10,000 emotions coursing thru me as I continued reading yr piece & listening to that song & the 2 big dominant ones were joy & gratitude, like, "Thank you for telling the truth, Michael, & thank you for putting into words all the confusion & horror of late & goddamit YES Michael you did it you took a big risk out there on the tightrope & you stretched yrself & you named the assignment & you delivered & the results were 10/10 & holy shit Michael did yr hands catch on fire while you were writing these words cuz HOLY SHIT.

Anyway {wipes face & straightens shirt} I'm all good now & my heart's a little bigger & I'm plugged into my humanity & I'm excited as I get into making some new podcast episodes. Bravo, Michael.

Oh, my lifelong Doppelgänger is (& this has never failed to shock me when a new acquaintance or stranger tells me I look identical to this person) is Slash from Guns & Roses.

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Thank you, Gabe! This comment hit just right. And I loved your reading play-by-play! All week felt like walking a tightrope with this piece, so I'm really touched to hear all of your thoughts here. Also, Slash from Guns & Roses is a helluva doppelgänger!

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1. Even when you tackle dark subjects, your voice keeps me from drowning in them. Thank you for digging into this very raw topic with grace and humility.

2. I'm a feminist. Meanwhile, my doppleganger struggles to celebrate the successes of other women I've decided are superior to me, physically, personally or professionally. Obviously, I feel INCREDIBLY gross about this, but that's the exercise we're doing, right?

5. I have no physical doppleganger that I know about. No one's ever told me I look like anyone other than my mother. I also just purchased megoolders.com as a domain name, so I expect we're a rare breed.

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Thank you, Meg! You’re doing the exercise right. I think you put your finger on something all feminists struggle with, if they’re being honest. Thank you for being brave enough to share a little about your doppelgänger.

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The brave part will be me not deleting my original comment out of shame.

Mirrors suck. 😩

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That’s true! But what you just said here is something I know many feminists won’t even admit privately. You are brave, Meg! And if your domain registration process tells us anything, you are one of a kind.

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This was dope. Thanks for this piece and glad you’re enjoying Naomi Klein. Haven’t check out Doppelgänger but now I’m gonna add to my reading list.

I had a similar realization about politics/social media/news/culture war during the lockdowns and it really crystallized with me about last year. I’ll just copy and paste what I wrote:

“Living online is a condition of generalized distrust, and these effects don’t vanish once we turn away from the screen. We operate from self-interest, which turns everyone we interact with into a self-projection. Faceless strangers are assumed to be the worst parts of us, minus the self-exculpatory context that allows us to justify or understand our own actions without the assumption of evil intent. This dynamic makes genuine intersectional politics impossible because there is an inherent suspicion of the out-group. Many conflicts within institutions in the last few years seem to be rooted in the expectation that the world should work like the internet. If you don’t like a person or an idea or an expression, you should be able to block them. Push a button and make them disappear forever. Like in the prisoner’s dilemma, we cannot negotiate a collective agenda in these circumstaces; we are stuck fighting for primacy in a culture war even as the world shudders and cracks around us.”

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Thank you for sharing what you wrote! Sometimes I wonder if these realizations were sped up, or crystallized, by the experience of the pandemic, where our digital lives became our actual lives, for the most part. It probably won't surprise you to learn that a lot of Klein's journey takes place during, and is heavily influenced by, the experience of the pandemic. If you haven't read it, I think you'll get a lot out of her book.

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For me it was the simultaneous cascade of the rapid collapse of Bernie Sanders's primary campaign, COVID, George Floyd, and the slow-rolling societal breakdown during lockdown. It was witnessing and being hyper-aware of all this bad news but being unable to change anything, a feeling that was particularly acute while being trapped in my apartment. Before, I tricked myself into thinking that burying myself in the news cycle and having the right set of opinions on current events was the building block to effective civic engagement and it lent me an air of intellectualism (the second part is because I wrote my master's thesis on Democratic political strategy).

Since then, politics and culture war on social media just feels catatonic and forever stuck in 2015. All of it just feels like an outmoded way of civic engagement that people don't know how to quit, or are unable to, because it's an easy and low-stakes way to "be involved."

This Atlantic article about "political hobbyism" was sort of the tipping scale for me that led me toward the light: https://www.theatlantic.com/ideas/archive/2020/01/political-hobbyists-are-ruining-politics/605212/

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I apparently have "one of those faces". I've been mistaken for many an old friend, at least from a distance. Once I was mistaken for someone's ex-husband. Fortunately I've never been mistaken for someone's arch enemy.

Good essay. We often need to spend time in darkness to appreciate the light.

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Thank you, David! Really appreciate the comment. I'm so curious about being mistaken for someone's ex husband. Say more! If you can. I understand if you can't. BUT that is a good mistaken identity story!

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It's a short story. It was in my twenties. I had long blonde hair and was probably wearing a big green trench coat. I was on my way into a shopping mall. A woman was on her way out. She stopped and stared at me. I got closer. She shook her head as if in relief. I can't remember if I asked her why she was staring or if she just volunteered, "For a minute I thought you were my ex-husband! But he's in New Mexico!"

We smiled at each other and I'm sure I tried to say something funny. Then I went into the mall and she went wherever she was going.

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Must’ve been a very unsettling feeling for her to know someone so intimately and then see a stranger who is so close to her husband that she stopped to say something.

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Oct 24, 2023Liked by Michael Estrin

Whoa. I read until the end but I’m still stuck on this: “Basically, we project all of our worst selves onto others, and so doing, we avoid looking at our own complicity. That’s why every doppelgänger story is about confronting the other, but ultimately, every doppelgänger story is really about confronting us.”

Imagine if EVERY TIME I was critical of another, I immediately acknowledged that the perceived fault was my own projection. I would learn so much! It would radically change my life!

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I'm far from perfect on that front, but I do try to ask myself if my criticism of others is really about them, or me, and honestly, just the act of asking the question has been a good thing for my life.

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Damn. Thanks for this.

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Thank you, Summer! I really appreciate you sharing this too. It means a lot!

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Oct 22, 2023Liked by Michael Estrin

This is one of the most thoughtful pieces I’ve read from you. You didn’t mention Israel/Palestine at all but I’ve been thinking about the “us” and “them” concept obsessively since the attacks of October 7th. (Maybe you’re deliberately hitting it sideways.) Anyway, have you seen Party Girl? Or Weeds?

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Thank you, Meryl! Hitting it sideways was a choice all right. Hitting it head on, which is something I'd rather do most of the time, felt like it would lead us into a smaller, more combative space, so I was hoping to take a wider view that might help us see ourselves a little better. As for Weeds, are you kidding? That's one of my favorite shows! I think I saw Party Girl when it came out, or a few years later when the blockbuster rental made its way around my dorm. But I'm hazy on the movie. I need to watch it again.

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Oct 22, 2023Liked by Michael Estrin

I think it was the right call and we’ll done!

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Oct 22, 2023Liked by Michael Estrin

Well

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Thank you! And also worth noting that the thanks goes to Christina who gave me notes on an earlier draft and encouraged me to hit it sideways. I know you know this, but my wife is really smart.

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I'm basically a dead ringer for Heath Ledger. I've dealt with this for decades now.

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The Heath Ledger thing must be very difficult for you, Andrew. You probably can't even get a nice meal out without people offering you movie deals, dates, etc.

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I love everything about this, they are things I ponder all the time. The us v them that I get mired in often. I think my doppelgänger is a nihilist, sometimes (most times) she just wants to sit back and let it all burn down in some sort of cleansing fire, but the me that is me (but both) desperately holds onto hope that we can change and be better.

Things like this, stories like this, make me believe that we can. If only.

Also, Jerry Garcia is my favorite, I’ve been a deadhead since childhood (hippy parents). I’ve been told my doppelgänger is the brunette version of Drew Barrymore, I don’t see it, but I do love her so I’ll take it as a win.

As for how I’m doing? Holding together with the help of other’s words.

Thanks for this stuff today.

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Thank you, Mesa, for this wonderful comment! And a big thank you for sharing about your nihilist doppelgänger. I think that's one of my doppelgängers too, although we sorta saw each other clearly in my late 20s, and I'm pretty sure we're not going to see each other again.

As for Jerry, I have to say it's always lovely when I get comments about him. One time I even got a free ice cream cone. I wasn't a deadhead growing up. Honestly, the name kinda turned me off. But then one day during the pandemic, we watched this six-part documentary on The Dead, and I realized I'd been wrong all along. I fell in love with their music and their spirit. Not sure if that makes me a deadhead since I've never been to a show and my understanding is that even Dead & Company is no longer, but I am a fan of what they built.

As for your celeb doppelgänger, I think it's awesome that you get to be a version of Drew Barrymore. Even if you don't see it, you get to enjoy it because you're a fan. That is a cool feeling, so I hope you enjoy it!

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I saw that six part documentary too. It was well done.

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So good! I think it’s called Long Strange Trip. Which tracks.

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I’m a big fan of Jerry’s work with mandolin player David Grisman. If you haven’t yet, I’d recommend giving a listen to The Pizza Tapes. It’s Jerry, Dave and bluegrass legend Tony Rice just having fun.

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I love that you got to change your mind about the Dead! That makes me happy 🙃 Thanks for a lovely response!

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Oct 22, 2023Liked by Michael Estrin

My celebrity doppelgänger is the John Goodman version of Fred Flintstone. Although I did have a family friend that called me Penn from the comedy magic team.

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You've got really solid celeb doppelgängers!

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Excellent stuff, Michael. My favorite line is this:

“[P]eace almost always follows war. Which means history is also telling us that peace is in our nature too.”

As a former history major, that just blows my mind.

I once had a girlfriend who spoke fluent German. Hearing her pronounce “doppelgänger” correctly was an unexpected pleasure. I wish I could remember the context in which that came up.

My celeb doppelgänger was Dave Matthews. I no longer look like him, and I’m glad. I got tired of drunks in bars yelling “do Satellite” at me.

I never really cared for DMB, which made it worse. You’re lucky. One can do a lot worse than being mistaken for the great Jerry Garcia.

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Thank you, I really appreciate everything in this comment, especially knowing that you're also a history nerd. And man, I am sorry about the Dave Matthews thing. I don't know your exact age, but I'm guessing that your prime bar years coincided with his peak fame, so I'm guessing that "Satellite" bit got old fast.

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The Satellite incident occurred on New Years Eve ‘98 or ‘99 at the old Twin Palms in Pasadena. Interesting night. Not only did I have that drunk guy to deal with, but I scorched my finger on a flaming sambuca shot.

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Tough way to ring in the new year.

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Oct 22, 2023Liked by Michael Estrin

1. Yes, a little dark, but that’s okay. I’ve got a cold, my doppelgänger probably doesn’t.

2.I work hard to believe in the oneness of all, but Worldly Steiner sings the 2000-year-old Man National Anthem: “Let Em All Go To Hell, Except Cave 76!”

3. All I can think of is “Strangers On A Train.”

4. I do, but all too often he’s already read my recs. Case in point - when I discovered John Fante.

5. I went through a Pavarotti period, but now I’m too old and he’s too dead.

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This comments is gold! It's got a cold, or maybe it doesn't. Plus, a reference to one of the greatest comedy bits of all time, Strangers on a Train, and John Fante. Seriously, more people need to know about Fante. Whenever some dude, it's always a dude, wants to talk my head off about Bukowski, I always ask them if they've read Fante. If they give me a blank look, I know to look for an early exit from the conversation.

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Oct 22, 2023Liked by Michael Estrin

I’d say, “you know, John Fante, the guy Bukowski described as ‘my god.’”

I started reading Fante after I noticed that a minor character in a Michael Connolly novel was reading ‘Ask The Dust.’

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