Excellent piece. And I have looked far and wide, in and out, up and down, and I have never found a practice as doable and as transformative as the one described in David Hawkins’ Letting Go. It achieves on the emotional level what the intellect could never do. It’s like mediation, but different. I’ve done yoga and meditation for 25 years, and this feels new. Possible. It gets to the nitty gritty of all you describe here, one human (with himself/herself/themself) at a time.
I read something today, about pets being abused. I feel hit in the plexus solar, and jaded (bronchitis breathlessness challenge) reading this essay, article, has made me dizzier.
I need to lie down in silence, no screens, any size.
Happy New Year, lovely substacking Earthlings 💙🌌🧘🏻♀️
Well, Michael, it’s Asha/Jennifer here. I’ve just finished reading DOPPELGÄNGER and the first thing I wanted to do was circle back here, where it all began, with your recommendation/essay. Perhaps to steady myself, definitely to thank you. Not just for the recommendation, or the extremely delightful Jennifer volley, or even this essay, which lands with 10x gravity now that I’ve read the book. I want to thank you for being a thoughtful, generous writer who sets the table and invites us to gather, laugh, and think, week after week. There is so much more I could say about social media and us/them etc etc and if we were actually sitting at a table with I think we’d have a blast. Just the fact that I am saying that speaks to what your work makes possible: a feeling of friendliness. I believe that feeling nudges the world in the right direction.
Asha, thank you so much for coming back to leave this comment! I really appreciate it. And if you should ever find yourself in Los Angeles, let me know, I'd love to get coffee and chat because I know we'd have a blast.
Reminds me of Us Them by Pink Floyd: and the lines on the map moved from side to side. I saw a t-shirt recently w the word Them in a circle w a line through it and I thought it means two things: stop thinking in terms of them and eradicate them.
You know, I was JUST a minute ago talking (I mean texting on Instagram) about this with someone I know IRL but rarely see because we don’t live in the same state. Anyway, I think we’d all be better off if we gave up social media. As a world. At least as a country. What are the chances of that happening? What are the chances we will figure out how to make it less of a silo?
Theoretically, old-fashioned libraries allowed us to “choose our own silo” but somehow it didn’t do what tech has done. Or to a lesser degree, anyway. We talked to our actual neighbors once in awhile. Who had different interests. Thanks for this post.
This is so good! The way our modern world has adopted and adapted and adapted to the us-v-them thinking behind many of our human atrocities, not to mention the more personal pains and tragedies, is wild. And yes I see my own complicity. Thank you for pointing to that so sagely. New here and glad I found you, Michael!
I’ll hit the easiest thing first. I’ve been confused with or told I reminded people of Isabella Rossellini back in the day. Randomly. I had to convince a woman in an airport security check line I was not her. She didn’t believe me. I should’ve pulled a Jerry Garcia like you and just agreed. She began enlisting others around us so they were staring at me trying to determine if I was or wasn’t her.
Turns out we both have Swedish roots, but that’s about as close as I got to thinking she was my doppelgänger. 😂
Thank you, Kim! Loved the Isabella Rossellini anecdote. Don't you just love it when strangers insist that they're right about you and you're wrong? Too funny.
I have a doppelgänger to the wise therapist woman who sits with people in their distress and intuitively knows how to guide them. She's a bundle of neuroses and muddling through each day struggling with anxiety and self-doubt 😉
Whoa. I read until the end but I’m still stuck on this: “Basically, we project all of our worst selves onto others, and so doing, we avoid looking at our own complicity. That’s why every doppelgänger story is about confronting the other, but ultimately, every doppelgänger story is really about confronting us.”
Imagine if EVERY TIME I was critical of another, I immediately acknowledged that the perceived fault was my own projection. I would learn so much! It would radically change my life!
I'm far from perfect on that front, but I do try to ask myself if my criticism of others is really about them, or me, and honestly, just the act of asking the question has been a good thing for my life.
My doppelgänger is the reflection of me that devolves into nihilism, and thinks people are intrinsically worthless, and we all live empty, meaningless lives full of richly deserved pain.
This also may be the regular version of me, in which case the doppelgänger is a happy-go-lucky preK teacher.
When I was young and had a shaved head, Vin Diesel. Nowadays, Bobby Canavale.
I think the first one is your doppelgänger. You confront him in your writing. This is good because it drives you to truth, and helps make your writing strong.
Re: your celebrity doppelgänger, I would pay money to see Vin play Bobby, or Bobby play Vin in someone kind of weird doppelgänger bio pic swap. Honestly, I’d pay for both. You’re stuck between two weird ones, dude.
A related problem I see is the individualising of systemic issues, and the conflation of structures of power with the bad actors abusing said systems for their own gain. For example, the feeling of not doing enough for the environment. While individual efforts are important, if considered as the main factor in climate change and pollution that feeling of impotence remains. By using a tote bag, I'm avoiding an unnecessary addition of a plastic bag to a landfill - but this cannot on its own counteract the systemic pollution caused by fishing industry. Likewise, it is all too easy to blame "the fishing industry" or "the government" for ineffective regulation and duty of care, but this let's all those in the position to create meaningful change, or at least stop destroying, y'know, that pale blue dot we all live on, off the hook.
And it's messy and complicated. The main appeal of these us vs them narratives, far as I can tell, is that it simplifies things. That's the paradoxical comfort of a conspiracy theory: that things arent bad due to a complex web of systems, people, incentives, etc that's fairly abstract and difficult to deal with, but instead an identifiable group of "bad guys" who can be opposed and defeated. In the Other we place those things we are scared to find in ourselves. To think otherwise, especially for people of relative privilege, would be to face the pain of complicity.
Great point, Moxie! Thank you for leaving this comment. I don't know if you've read Klein's book, but she goes into great detail about systems and individuals. That's really her wheelhouse, and it plays a very big role in Doppelgängers. If you haven't read the book yet, I think you'll get a lot out of it. But yeah, you're right on the money here.
This is great and "even the right words on social media come out wrong" is a brilliant line and possibly true (I barely use social media, so can't say).
One of my favourite doppelgänger pieces is the poem "The Other" by Edward Thomas, which is decidedly eerie. It ends:
Thank you for this comment, Jeffrey! And thank you for sharing the Edward Thomas poem. Very powerful stuff! Also, I was hoping someone in the comments would jump in with a mention of their twin, so thank you for fulfilling that wish!
Excellent piece. And I have looked far and wide, in and out, up and down, and I have never found a practice as doable and as transformative as the one described in David Hawkins’ Letting Go. It achieves on the emotional level what the intellect could never do. It’s like mediation, but different. I’ve done yoga and meditation for 25 years, and this feels new. Possible. It gets to the nitty gritty of all you describe here, one human (with himself/herself/themself) at a time.
Thanks Allison! I’m going to grab a copy of Letting Go.
Yay! I think it’s a good listen! :)
I read something today, about pets being abused. I feel hit in the plexus solar, and jaded (bronchitis breathlessness challenge) reading this essay, article, has made me dizzier.
I need to lie down in silence, no screens, any size.
Happy New Year, lovely substacking Earthlings 💙🌌🧘🏻♀️
Well, Michael, it’s Asha/Jennifer here. I’ve just finished reading DOPPELGÄNGER and the first thing I wanted to do was circle back here, where it all began, with your recommendation/essay. Perhaps to steady myself, definitely to thank you. Not just for the recommendation, or the extremely delightful Jennifer volley, or even this essay, which lands with 10x gravity now that I’ve read the book. I want to thank you for being a thoughtful, generous writer who sets the table and invites us to gather, laugh, and think, week after week. There is so much more I could say about social media and us/them etc etc and if we were actually sitting at a table with I think we’d have a blast. Just the fact that I am saying that speaks to what your work makes possible: a feeling of friendliness. I believe that feeling nudges the world in the right direction.
Asha, thank you so much for coming back to leave this comment! I really appreciate it. And if you should ever find yourself in Los Angeles, let me know, I'd love to get coffee and chat because I know we'd have a blast.
Reminds me of Us Them by Pink Floyd: and the lines on the map moved from side to side. I saw a t-shirt recently w the word Them in a circle w a line through it and I thought it means two things: stop thinking in terms of them and eradicate them.
You know, I was JUST a minute ago talking (I mean texting on Instagram) about this with someone I know IRL but rarely see because we don’t live in the same state. Anyway, I think we’d all be better off if we gave up social media. As a world. At least as a country. What are the chances of that happening? What are the chances we will figure out how to make it less of a silo?
Theoretically, old-fashioned libraries allowed us to “choose our own silo” but somehow it didn’t do what tech has done. Or to a lesser degree, anyway. We talked to our actual neighbors once in awhile. Who had different interests. Thanks for this post.
This is so good! The way our modern world has adopted and adapted and adapted to the us-v-them thinking behind many of our human atrocities, not to mention the more personal pains and tragedies, is wild. And yes I see my own complicity. Thank you for pointing to that so sagely. New here and glad I found you, Michael!
Thank you, Holly! Really appreciate you leaving this comment and saying hi. Welcome to the Situation Normal community. I'm glad you're here!
Lots to mull on with this post.
I’ll hit the easiest thing first. I’ve been confused with or told I reminded people of Isabella Rossellini back in the day. Randomly. I had to convince a woman in an airport security check line I was not her. She didn’t believe me. I should’ve pulled a Jerry Garcia like you and just agreed. She began enlisting others around us so they were staring at me trying to determine if I was or wasn’t her.
Turns out we both have Swedish roots, but that’s about as close as I got to thinking she was my doppelgänger. 😂
Thank you, Kim! Loved the Isabella Rossellini anecdote. Don't you just love it when strangers insist that they're right about you and you're wrong? Too funny.
This is just the sort of thing you people would say. 😜
But really, wonderful piece.
Perfect, Matt, just perfect!
Also, thank you for sharing this one, it means a lot!
bro
I have a doppelgänger to the wise therapist woman who sits with people in their distress and intuitively knows how to guide them. She's a bundle of neuroses and muddling through each day struggling with anxiety and self-doubt 😉
Well put, Vicki. And well done struggling through anxiety and self-doubt to render help.
Vocal doppleganger: Julia Stiles.
Visual doppleganger: at one point, Parker Posey
A friend in middle school once told me he sat next to my exact double on an airplane.
Wow, Amber, you’ve got strong doppelgänger energy!
Whoa. I read until the end but I’m still stuck on this: “Basically, we project all of our worst selves onto others, and so doing, we avoid looking at our own complicity. That’s why every doppelgänger story is about confronting the other, but ultimately, every doppelgänger story is really about confronting us.”
Imagine if EVERY TIME I was critical of another, I immediately acknowledged that the perceived fault was my own projection. I would learn so much! It would radically change my life!
I'm far from perfect on that front, but I do try to ask myself if my criticism of others is really about them, or me, and honestly, just the act of asking the question has been a good thing for my life.
Damn. Thanks for this.
Thank you, Summer! I really appreciate you sharing this too. It means a lot!
My doppelgänger is the reflection of me that devolves into nihilism, and thinks people are intrinsically worthless, and we all live empty, meaningless lives full of richly deserved pain.
This also may be the regular version of me, in which case the doppelgänger is a happy-go-lucky preK teacher.
When I was young and had a shaved head, Vin Diesel. Nowadays, Bobby Canavale.
I think the first one is your doppelgänger. You confront him in your writing. This is good because it drives you to truth, and helps make your writing strong.
Re: your celebrity doppelgänger, I would pay money to see Vin play Bobby, or Bobby play Vin in someone kind of weird doppelgänger bio pic swap. Honestly, I’d pay for both. You’re stuck between two weird ones, dude.
Have you seen Boardwalk Empire? Canavale is insane in that show, and people who link me with him frequently site that performance as their source.
Diesel as Canavale in a movie about the making of Boardwalk Empire is Hollywood gold. Top that, AI.
I missed Boardwalk in its first run. I'm gonna need to remedy that. But yes, AI can't beat that kind of gold.
I was late and almost skipped the show, but it's definitely worth checking out.
Didn't have HBO back then, but I've got HBO now. Or, Max, or whatever the hell they're calling it today.
A related problem I see is the individualising of systemic issues, and the conflation of structures of power with the bad actors abusing said systems for their own gain. For example, the feeling of not doing enough for the environment. While individual efforts are important, if considered as the main factor in climate change and pollution that feeling of impotence remains. By using a tote bag, I'm avoiding an unnecessary addition of a plastic bag to a landfill - but this cannot on its own counteract the systemic pollution caused by fishing industry. Likewise, it is all too easy to blame "the fishing industry" or "the government" for ineffective regulation and duty of care, but this let's all those in the position to create meaningful change, or at least stop destroying, y'know, that pale blue dot we all live on, off the hook.
And it's messy and complicated. The main appeal of these us vs them narratives, far as I can tell, is that it simplifies things. That's the paradoxical comfort of a conspiracy theory: that things arent bad due to a complex web of systems, people, incentives, etc that's fairly abstract and difficult to deal with, but instead an identifiable group of "bad guys" who can be opposed and defeated. In the Other we place those things we are scared to find in ourselves. To think otherwise, especially for people of relative privilege, would be to face the pain of complicity.
Great point, Moxie! Thank you for leaving this comment. I don't know if you've read Klein's book, but she goes into great detail about systems and individuals. That's really her wheelhouse, and it plays a very big role in Doppelgängers. If you haven't read the book yet, I think you'll get a lot out of it. But yeah, you're right on the money here.
This is great and "even the right words on social media come out wrong" is a brilliant line and possibly true (I barely use social media, so can't say).
One of my favourite doppelgänger pieces is the poem "The Other" by Edward Thomas, which is decidedly eerie. It ends:
"He goes: I follow: no release
Until he ceases. Then I also shall cease."
https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poems/53750/the-other-56d2335583806
The doppelgänger I get mixed up with is my identical twin brother. Our extreme workaround has been to live in separate continents most of the time.
Thank you for this comment, Jeffrey! And thank you for sharing the Edward Thomas poem. Very powerful stuff! Also, I was hoping someone in the comments would jump in with a mention of their twin, so thank you for fulfilling that wish!