We took an Alaskan cruise. I kept a log.

After a two-week hiatus, Situation Normal is back from vacation. Christina and I joined her parents, Steve and Cheryl, on a seven-day Alaskan cruise. The idea was to celebrate Steve and Cheryl’s 30th anniversary, but that was in 2020, and you know how that year went. We tried again for the so-called “hot vax summer” of 2021, but Canada put the kibosh on cruising in their waters. Finally, after two years, our ship came in. The following is a chronicle of our voyage.

Day One - Seattle

One important takeaway from Homer’s Odyssey is that Poseidon ain’t nothing to fuck with. I’m not a polytheist, but I respect the sea god. Upon boarding, we immediately went to our “muster station” in the music hall for a safety briefing.

But just like airlines, cruise ships send mixed signals about safety. First, they tell you what to do in the event of an emergency, then they offer you booze. I’m not a drinker, so I passed on the booze, opting instead for my drug of choice: people-watching.

Our ship, Ovati…