So, Michael, how do you explain this quote from "The Big Chill": Michael: Well where I work we only have one editorial rule. You can't write anything longer than it takes your average person to take an average crap.”
It's been years since I've seen The Big Chill. But I'm pretty sure the magazine Jeff Goldblum worked for is either out of business, or a shell of it's former self.
You don't need paper. Poo as much as you need then wash your bum. Clean cloth every time. leave the dirty one in a bucket, pour on some bleach and close the lid. Every day, every other day or once a week, pour out the bleach (wear rubber gloves) and put the cloths in the washing machine and wash on hottest setting. Use washing powder or liquid and maybe a little more bleach. Saves money and time spent in the shop, going to the shop etc. As long as you're not allergic to bleach...... (You can get stuff that they market for baby nappies- I guess thats diapers to you.)
So happy to read about toilet paper 🧻. I was recently talking to my son’s father in law about toilet paper made from bamboo. It fascinated me and I asked him if he ever heard of TP made from bamboo. Out of the corner of my eye 👁️ I see my 20 something grandson with a big grin 😀 on his face. I asked what he was laughing about and he asked if we were talking about toilet paper. When I said yes, he said “ yep, that.” Glad I’m not alone thinking about this important subject.
I always thought hitting my macros was something I wanted to do when a Word document doesn't look like what I wanted!
The comment about Musk was right. He's so full up that he must not poop.
TP is throwing money down the toilet.. You could collect and use leaves instead to save money, but they'd probably clog the plumbing.
Costco is good for buying TP. And you can usually get a bidet seat there to decrease the amount you use.
BTW, most protein doesn't have a lot of fiber so it doesn't usually make more poop. Milk proteins with lactose in protein shakes can sometimes do it though.
I DON'T eat a high protein diet but I'm still a pooping machine and i associate it with having a fast metabolism, which I base off of absolutely nothing at all and definitely not science.
Significant poop problems since COVID in 2020. Eating a lot doesn’t help. Hitting my macros doesn’t help. Doctors and their pills don’t help. The point is, avoid COVID. Do not fucking recommend.
Is helping a person or people buy a house considered “charity” in Brewster’s Millions? I think I would give a lot to people who can’t work due to long COVID but who also haven’t been able to obtain disability benefits because of how great America is.
I'm sorry about the long-running shit you're dealing with since Covid, Amy. It sounds awful. So many experts, so few answers.
As for the houses, yes, I think it would count as charity under Brewster's Millions rules, and if not charity, then an asset, so no good. BTW, the movie is very funny. Richard Pryor & John Candy are great together.
Stop wasting money on TP!! The best purchase I made during the pandemic was a bidet. $35, a monkey can hook it up to any toilet, and (paired with a 24 pack of super cheap wash cloths from Amazon) no more toilet paper crisis! Best $50 I have ever spent, even going on 5 hrs later.
1. I don't think so, but if there is, I want to be his literary agent.
2. It's been a long time, but I loved that movie. By the way, have you ever seen Albert Brooks' classic standup bit where he played a mime who wouldn't shut up?
3. Charity, airline tickets, and pizza. Lots of pizza.
4. Yes. I will not go deep on this one., but if you want to get in touch with your inner self, buy cheap toilet paper.
5. Kirkland, at Costco. Note: they call it 'Bathroom Tissue,' so you might miss it.
There is a Ralph's, but their parking lot is ... um ... well it's one of those fucked up deep valley strip males. So that Ralph's is out. There's a really nice Ralph's in the other direction, but it's a bit far to be convenient, especially since I'd pass a Trader Joe's, Smart & Final, Whole Foods, Aldi, and of course, Vons.
It's also kind of a math problem toward the end of the day. But weirdly I don't find that annoying. It's like I do a little arithmetic and the answer is a string cheese.
I'll take those gazillion bucks and fund the California express train so we can stop focusing on the cost and I can get a comfortable ride. every train will have bidets so we won't have to stop at Costco for 96 rolls of TP and the 2lb deboned roast chicken. Whatever $ is leftover funds all student loans, medical debt, and fixes public radio/television so I don't get 5x/year campaigns.
There are millions of service workers that could use tips. Imagine the buzz of slews of coffee shops getting 10s of thousand dollar tips in their tip jars.
So, Michael, how do you explain this quote from "The Big Chill": Michael: Well where I work we only have one editorial rule. You can't write anything longer than it takes your average person to take an average crap.”
It's been years since I've seen The Big Chill. But I'm pretty sure the magazine Jeff Goldblum worked for is either out of business, or a shell of it's former self.
Print is dead. Long live print!
You don't need paper. Poo as much as you need then wash your bum. Clean cloth every time. leave the dirty one in a bucket, pour on some bleach and close the lid. Every day, every other day or once a week, pour out the bleach (wear rubber gloves) and put the cloths in the washing machine and wash on hottest setting. Use washing powder or liquid and maybe a little more bleach. Saves money and time spent in the shop, going to the shop etc. As long as you're not allergic to bleach...... (You can get stuff that they market for baby nappies- I guess thats diapers to you.)
This god forsaken platform needs more articles about poop
So happy to read about toilet paper 🧻. I was recently talking to my son’s father in law about toilet paper made from bamboo. It fascinated me and I asked him if he ever heard of TP made from bamboo. Out of the corner of my eye 👁️ I see my 20 something grandson with a big grin 😀 on his face. I asked what he was laughing about and he asked if we were talking about toilet paper. When I said yes, he said “ yep, that.” Glad I’m not alone thinking about this important subject.
2. In the vein of that movie I’m looking at 1 day when I had the opportunity to invest in Bitcoin (Casio).
3. Give it all away. Leave cash everywhere.
4. So we’re not “taking” a dump after all. Remember the money printed TP rolls?
5. Don’t buy 1 ply because it’s cheaper. You will end up using twice as much. I had to teach hubby this.
Our new house has a bidet but I must be using it wrong, because unless you wanna walk around with wet-butt, you still need TP.
I always thought hitting my macros was something I wanted to do when a Word document doesn't look like what I wanted!
The comment about Musk was right. He's so full up that he must not poop.
TP is throwing money down the toilet.. You could collect and use leaves instead to save money, but they'd probably clog the plumbing.
Costco is good for buying TP. And you can usually get a bidet seat there to decrease the amount you use.
BTW, most protein doesn't have a lot of fiber so it doesn't usually make more poop. Milk proteins with lactose in protein shakes can sometimes do it though.
I never understood Macros in Word. Actually, there's a lot I don't understand or know how to do with Word.
I DON'T eat a high protein diet but I'm still a pooping machine and i associate it with having a fast metabolism, which I base off of absolutely nothing at all and definitely not science.
All makes sense. Every word.
Significant poop problems since COVID in 2020. Eating a lot doesn’t help. Hitting my macros doesn’t help. Doctors and their pills don’t help. The point is, avoid COVID. Do not fucking recommend.
Is helping a person or people buy a house considered “charity” in Brewster’s Millions? I think I would give a lot to people who can’t work due to long COVID but who also haven’t been able to obtain disability benefits because of how great America is.
I'm sorry about the long-running shit you're dealing with since Covid, Amy. It sounds awful. So many experts, so few answers.
As for the houses, yes, I think it would count as charity under Brewster's Millions rules, and if not charity, then an asset, so no good. BTW, the movie is very funny. Richard Pryor & John Candy are great together.
Ahh, I thought the rule just meant no assets for Richard Pryor. I definitely need to see this movie. And thanks for your compassion 😌
Stop wasting money on TP!! The best purchase I made during the pandemic was a bidet. $35, a monkey can hook it up to any toilet, and (paired with a 24 pack of super cheap wash cloths from Amazon) no more toilet paper crisis! Best $50 I have ever spent, even going on 5 hrs later.
That sounds like life-changing ROI right there.
There isn't a Ralph's near you?
1. I don't think so, but if there is, I want to be his literary agent.
2. It's been a long time, but I loved that movie. By the way, have you ever seen Albert Brooks' classic standup bit where he played a mime who wouldn't shut up?
3. Charity, airline tickets, and pizza. Lots of pizza.
4. Yes. I will not go deep on this one., but if you want to get in touch with your inner self, buy cheap toilet paper.
5. Kirkland, at Costco. Note: they call it 'Bathroom Tissue,' so you might miss it.
There is a Ralph's, but their parking lot is ... um ... well it's one of those fucked up deep valley strip males. So that Ralph's is out. There's a really nice Ralph's in the other direction, but it's a bit far to be convenient, especially since I'd pass a Trader Joe's, Smart & Final, Whole Foods, Aldi, and of course, Vons.
200g of protein is quite the feat! I try to do 100g a day and miss often. It does really take the joy out of eating at times.
It's also kind of a math problem toward the end of the day. But weirdly I don't find that annoying. It's like I do a little arithmetic and the answer is a string cheese.
Just thought I'd mention, I have your book and it lives on the little shelf next to my toilet. Can't say how many times I have read it, but a lot!
Thank you for giving my book a good home, Sharron! Are we talking Ride Share or NSFW?
Ride Share, So funny!
I'll take those gazillion bucks and fund the California express train so we can stop focusing on the cost and I can get a comfortable ride. every train will have bidets so we won't have to stop at Costco for 96 rolls of TP and the 2lb deboned roast chicken. Whatever $ is leftover funds all student loans, medical debt, and fixes public radio/television so I don't get 5x/year campaigns.
Betsy, you are now the leading candidate for governor. This is an A+ comment all the way around.
Woohoo!! Would my family get to live in the old Governor’s Mansion in Sacramento? I hope someone installed A/C.
Absolutely!
This newsletter is full of poop. ;-)
There are millions of service workers that could use tips. Imagine the buzz of slews of coffee shops getting 10s of thousand dollar tips in their tip jars.
Love it!